I'm HOME!!!!! I got home today around 1:30 and took a shower and went to Crystal's. I chilled for a while, until about 7:15. I 2 wayed Ryan again today and talked to him when I was with Crystal. Then I went to Pam's house. I 2 wayed him again at her house and let her talk to him since he's her nephew. We talked for a while, then I called him on his house phone. I chilled with Pam for a while, Cody came home but I am so disguested with him that I didnt talk to him, I am to the point where he hurt me so bad I dont even want to hear his name. He chose her, whatever, its over. Fuck him. Let's see what happens when he loses her, right? But its not that easy, I cant turn my back on him, everyone else in his life has, but I have been the only true, solid friend hes ever known, the only one who stuck around when things got bad. I just cant do it anymore, but something is still telling me I have to. What do I do? At Crystal's, I was telling Terrie about Ryan and she was like, "I still think Adam likes you, I think he's infatuated, you should see the way he looks at you when you're partying" but its like this, hes with Dawn, hes moving in with her in March, he is already staying with her, why would he be doing all of that, going through all of that trouble if he wants me? Terrie said hes settling for Dawn. Andi, Sammie and Crystal agreed. But whatever, I dont know. I think I am just gonna see what happens with what I got right now and I guess I will take it from there. But what should I do? Who should I believe? I have no one to talk to about any of this and I am so confused!!!! Its driving me crazy!