maybe i should get on here more often...

yup i'm in college know...wow...its pretty good. lots of work to do, going to classes. should be writing a criminology research paper, but i'm not...hahahaha...oh well...but yea, life isn't too bad. being away from home is good becuase that is were most of my stress came from. my family. i can't wait to see my boy again!! it'll be four months since i last saw him, and thats a damn long time!

yea i haven't been on here for awhile...wow...so college is gonna cost sooooooooooo much money, its ridiculous! i'm stressing about it. getting a job to pay for everything. sometimes i wish i did apply to the academy like my boy. he's done so much so far and gone to so many places. i really would much rather have my ass kicked than go through what i'm going through right now. the scary thing is, is that he told me i probably could do it. you know get in and get through all the shit. well the shit is easier now, cuz they softened up a lot of the summer training but still. i was like whoa...you figure not having to pay for college, but serving 5 years after...shit, right now that looks good to me...i don't know what i'm thinking, but its just a thought...

so this week, i started running again. i have to do it, otherwise i never will. i want to start good habits before i go off to college in the fall. there is no way i'm gonna gain the freshman 15. i haven't really ran for a couple months, so i thought i was gonna die on the run i planned on doing. i ran around my block, and there are a couple hills and its about a mile and 3/4, so its a pretty good run. the first time i was able to get through it. i was happy. it just sucks that right before i get back home there is a steep ass hill. it feels good to do something again. i want to keep running, and i'm going to start expanding my run. so i'm gonna make it longer and longer. i wonder how much i can push myself. i'm aiming for 6 miles by the end of july/august. so we'll see what happens. i love it, i really do. no matter how much it sucks while doing it, i love the feeling afterward. i know that while my boyfriend is home i'll be getting a good workout, because i'm gonna work out with him and he's gonna whip my ass into shape. it'll be fun (i hope) i can't wait till he comes home!!!!! only 8 days!!

so i just got off the phone with my lovely boyfriend. we had almost a 2 hr arguement about what would happen if one or more our kids (if we have them together) were to be gay. i'm willing to accept my children for whomever they wish to be. its just they way they are and i can't change it. i will love my children for who they are and support them. being gay isn't something you can change about yourself, its just what happens. i personally do not have a problem with gay people, or bi or whatever. i don't really care. he says that if his kid is gay, he'll be kicked out of his life once he reaches 18. that is wrong. you shouldn't handle the situation like that! grrrrr... i don't feel like writing anymore..i will later

so in the unwritten code of friends, you're not supposed to abandon your friends for a guy. its okay to have a boyfriend, but to totally block yourslef from them is just not cool! so yes, that has recently happened. i really don't understand. so first these two started becoming good friends and got closer and closer, and that was cool and all whatever. but all of a sudden they were in their own little world all the time. in the halls they wouldn't say hi if they were together. i was friends with both of them too! the guy would say hi to me and talk whenever she is not with him. its really annoying! i don't understand. what did we ever do to them. whatever!! i did the opposite with my boyfriend. one of my friends was like i think you should spend more time with your boy. i was scared i was going to turn into one of those types of couples that were attached at the hip. i'm glad we didn't. ugh...and they are also always making out and walking at the same time! ok pda please! alrite a little peck is cool, holding hands, hugs, perfectly fine. but shoving tongues in eachothers mouths and sucking face, is for when your in privacy. please spare us! really i don't need to see you guys swap spit. especially when you can't avoid it cuz you see them everywhere you go! arg... ok almost done... so there is a senior trip that they are both going on, and she thinks that they will be able to room together! ahahaha...ok....sure...right...whatever... i was talking with one of his friends and she's planning on taking advantage of him! poor guy. i know its okay, but please be careful, i don't think he's ready for that! i think she wants to take his big V is because its something no one else can have except for her. and she wants to prove that he is hers. she is going to the college he was thinking about so they can go together, but he got a great offer to another school in oregon. so i think she might be using sex to keep him near her. i know, i know, but what other reasons could there be? so yea there's my rant...just had to let it out.

soooooo.... why is it that i'm am still civil towards the guy that cheated on my friend 4 out of the 7 months they went out. he denied it, but i witnessed it. i really don't know. i shouldn't be nice to him, but we go back. we've been friends for like 6 years now, and i can't really make myself not like him. he is a really nice guy, besides the fact he cheated on my friend. really friendly, caring, and easy to talk to. Even back in middle school we had crushes on eachother. hahaha...wow...those days...soooo long ago! i can't wait to graduate!!! ahhh!!!! hahahaha...can't wait....well back to studying for ap calc! its almost over...sooooo close! 26 days till my baby comes home to me!

hmmm....so i went on xanga for the first time in ages today! hahaha...its kinda funny reading everything that i wrote last year. sooo much has changed. its crazy, and graduation is a month and a half away. i really can't wait. i know it will be sad, but i just can't wait!!!!!! but lovely calculus is ruining it for now....grrrr...i can't wait till that stupid class is over. the thing is i'll be taking it all through college. oh well...thats just the way it is...and i know life will probably be better in 2 weeks. running shoes....hmmm...gotta find some. i'm gonna make adrien whoop me into shape. hahahaha...it'll be fun. well gotta get my money to buy my prom tickets. yay! prom..its gonna be great.

me! hahahahahaha well i've been thinking bout it and i really can't wait to go to college next fall. i'm so excited to go to UCI. its such an awesome school and i know i'm gonna love it down there. going down there with brett is gonna be great. we are both gonna be in almost the same types of classes, and it'll be nice having a familiar face in somewhere that is totally foreign to you. we are planning on long board skateboarding around campus together when we get bored. its gonna be soooooooo great! and the rec center is brand new and free to students, so i'll definitely be hitting that up. i'm determined to stay in shape! i swear! i was told i shouldn't go for a full course load first quarter, but whatever, i'm gonna do it. maybe once i get used to it, i'll get a job. i'm gonna need the mula. everything is gonna be hella expensive. especially plane tickets! i'm gonna be flying home and then a couple weekends i'll be flying out to naptown to visit the boy! it'll be so much easier because i'm not gonna need parental permission. i can just go! i'm happy because i'm planning on going for his birthday. the big 21! hahahaha...it'll be fun. and i have a place to stay which is cool. so i won't be spending tooo much money. i can't wait any longer! graduation plese come just a bit faster!!!!!! 31 days till he comes home! You scored as Athletic Tomboy. Athletic Tomboy69%Hippy56%Slut50%Nerdy Girl44%Loser31%Goth25%Popular Bitch25%Preppy Girl13%What type of girl are you?!!created with QuizFarm.com

wow...haven't updated in awhile. well i guess there really isn't much to update on. me and adrien were close to breaking up one nite, but there is soooo much on that topic that i don't really want to start. softballs been good. we've been winning, so its not that bad. i really can't push myself in that sport anymore. its weird. maybe i should focus, but i really don't know what it is. damn only 8 days till the ap calc test FCUK! hahahaha...yea well back to lovely physics. yay!

yea we do nothing in physics really...hahaha good times... watch this...we are really bored! http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=o1QvkvZmpUI hahaha...

prom, prom, prom....i know its not for a couple months but whatever. so for once i actually have a date! adrien... yay!!! i was the only one of my friends to have one till yesterday. and let's say, i was the cupid in this one. hahaha...yea i'm good well my friend casey had been thinking about taking adrien's friend nate to prom, but she just wasn't sure. i kept telling her that she should because they had known eachother back when he was still in highschool, and him and adrien are friends, so it would be perfect. i didn't see a problem, but she kept going "oh i don't know..." so last weekend at a party, one of my big mouth friends while drunk, saw nate and told him everything! i was like wow, you're a smart one. the next day i get a message from nate asking if anything that he heard was true and if it was he really needs casey to call him so he can set up his schedule. i told casye about this message and asked her what i should write back, but she just kept saying "i don't know..." so i took matters into my own hands, i messaged nate back telling him about how she was worried it would be awkward and that he woudldn't have fun and whatnot. and i got a message back and he said to call him. so i did and he was REALLY excited that she wanted to take him. he was gonna come home early from this thing in texas just for our prom. so we talked a bit, and i was like okay, i'm gonna have her call you... (casey doesn't know i said all this...whoops!) well i sorta tell casey i talked to him and i was like call him PLEASE!!!! well she finally had the guts and did...and he's going with us. yay! hahahaha...they are even going out to lunch on friday and looking at tuxedoes. i would have to say i had a little part in this...hahaha...it turned out good. i know prom is gonna be hella fun! now to get megan a date...

i sent this to my boy the other day... Times In Love by Sherri Anderson There are times when words aren’t enough feelings can’t always be put into words; because they are inadequate and often escape us sometimes, there are only feelings. There are times when all you need is a look; a silent, wordless connection between souls an understanding that needs no translation a natural, knowing stare that says everything. There are times when all you need is a touch; nothing spoken - just the gesture of reaching out touching, silently transferring your energy conveying something that comes from within There are times when all you need is acceptance to know that you are valued as you are that any changes you make only enhance you more as you discover yourself. There are times when all you need is love no conditions or demands, only simplicity. to know that for no reason at all another chooses you over all others. There are times when all you ever wanted, was to be completed by another person. There are times when you need all of these things there are times when nothing else matters. and here is the response i got from him... True, there are times when I may need one of those things, but every second of every day I need you. always and forever, i'll love you. when i read this it made me smile. it feels great to know that someone loves and cares for you. i can't wait to see him in 51 days!!!

wow how much does this suck...i've tried my best not getting sick. you know washing my hands, drinkin lots of orange juice and tea, taking that airborne shit...damn it doesn't work!!! I HATE BEING SICK!!!! you know the whole running nose, soar throat bit...yea it sucks. then having a stuffy nose, and clogged ears. yea i just want it all to be gone. ahhhhh!!!!! i can't be sick during softball or during this month!!! we have a very small team this year for softball, so being sick is not an option. especially since i'm starting shortstop. there is not really anyone to replace me, which kinda sucks. so i can't ever sit out. and... this month is review month before ap exams and everyday we are reviewing. i can't really miss anything. especially in calculus. i'm having a hard time in that class, so i can't really miss it. grrr.....I HATE THIS!!!! i wish i was never sick. it would be soooooooo awesome.

well i decided to go to uc irvine down in so cal, i thought i was the only one going too. but....one of my good friends is also going down there!!!! i'm sooo excited, this makes me sooo happy. i'll have someone down there with me. i'm gonna have fun down in socal. i'm gonna be saying hella, hella lot because that is a norcal thing. i'm also gonna represent my sf giants, WHAT! haha, cuz i'll be in dodger territory. yea itll be fun. i'm scared, but i really can't wait! so i'm kinda glad that berkeley didn't accept me. i think its gonna work out. if i don't like it next year, i can always transfer so itll be okay. irvine has my major and minor too. i want to major in chemistry and do a minor in criminal justice. all that to be a special agent. that job is gonna be challenging, but thats what i want. wow i'm really exicted. it might be that or the lack of sleep i have been getting because of work. oh well...later peoples

so yea...i checked out the berkeley website yesterday and i didn't get in. oh well whatever. there is always irvine. i was kinda depressed for a while, but you know what if it wasn't meant to be, it wasn't meant to be. well off to the giants game, lets hope it doesn't rain.

today i went to the great mall with my mom and went prom dress shopping. i really had my heart set on getting one that was shorter and halter. but the one i got I LOVE! its long and satiny and is a deep rich purple color. i never i really thought i would get a dress like that, but it was gorgeous. i can't wait to wear it to show adrien. hes not gonna know what it looks like till prom so its gonna be a suprise. i can't wait!

this list might get a bit long, so just as a warning. -Adrien, he is definitely one of the things i love most, he is my best friend and is there for me and knows what to do to make me happy. -Stephy-poo, my other best friend. we are so much alike it is scary. we can be fools together and just talk about anything. -chocolate, no need for an explanation. all girls would know why we love chocolate. -being half filipino, i love the culture, the food, the people. its nice having that. especially the food. oh man, my mom is awesome at cooking adobo, lumpias, and pancit. that stuff is hella good. -having a job, its kind of a love hate relationship. i love being there, but making money is fricking awesome. -banana waffles/pancakes, my lolo made them for me when i was younger and was passed on the secret recipe. whenever i eat them i feel like a little kid again. its my comfort food. -hugs, before, like when i was a sophomore, i hated hugs. even when i was with friends. the only hugs i would give were to family or to adrien. nowadays i love hugs. i don't cringe anymore. hahahaha -cellphones, if i didn't have a cellphone i really don't know what i would do with myself. i think i would go crazy. its the only way i can keep in touch with adrien. its the only way we can have our "telephone dates." its what we do since i can only see him a couple times a year. -my bed, its awesome. i love how comfy and warm it is. its one of my most favorite places to be. -being with adrien, and everything that goes along with it. just holding hands, having someone to cuddle and hold. its awesome. whenever i'm with him i'm happy. -airplanes- if it weren't for airplanes, i probably would not be able to see adrien as much. even though they take him away from me, they also bring him back. -krispy kreme donuts, so what if they are bad for you. if you want instant joy, bite down into one of those. mmmm... -reading, its one thing i have been doing my whole life. i like just sitting around and reading a good book. i would go through 3 or 4 books a week, easily when i was younger. i don't have much time now, but i'm trying. -the smell of freshly dryed clothes, you know from the dryer. i like the smell, to me its like warm and fuzzy. hahaha yea i know i'm weird -hoodies, i can never have enough. just wear it with a pair of jeans and your set. soooo warm and comfy... -flip flops, i'm a cali girl, what can i say. i always have to wear flip flops. even when its raining. thats the best. i have one pair and wear them till i can't anymore. i like to get my money's worth. -green tea, its soothing when your sick and have a stuffy nose. i only like hot green tea not cold. its yummy. -music, really who doesn't love it. i love just sitting and listening. i won't listen to country though. please, that is torture. -my sailor bear, i hug it and hold it when i go to sleep. it helps me get through those days when i'm missing adrien way too much. -my laptop, what would i do without this thing. having to share a computer would really suck. especially since everyone in my family always wants to be on it. -food, i'm one of those girls who just loves to eat. food is sooo awesome. i can just eat and eat and eat. i love food. last but not least... -my family, even though they can be annoying and get on my nerves all the time, they are always there for me. i might add more if i think of more...

well i thought this week was gonna blow, like really bad, but its not so far. i first find out that i got accepted to one of the hardest ucs, which is like totally awesome!! and today we got our grades for the first part of the semester and i have a B in ap calculus!!! what!! the class i despise the most and i have a pretty decent grade. it feels sooooooo good. and i got 100% on the last quiz. man its been going good...i like this...hahaha damn first softball game of the season tomorrow, i'm hella nervous, its been so long since i've played an actual game. we are in a lower division so it should be easier, but we'll see...gah!!! hahaha ohh softball, all my bruises, scrapes,aches,and pains are for the love of the game. hahaha..oh well... I WANT SLEEP!

well i checked the uc san diego site and.... I GOT IN!!! yay!! so thats 3 out of 4 for me. UCI,UCI, UCSD....hopefully i can add cal to the list. 10 days till cal posts admissions!!