i really should title these so i know what the hell they're about. so jade said that brent said that scoot said that he's falling for me. fuckk. idk though, i mean.. idk. shit. i don't want him to love me because i know i'm never going to love him, but it's kinda nice in a way. he really appreciates me, in every way possible. plus he got me a dozen roses the other day for no god damn reason. i'm a sucker for red roses. i know in my heart, throughout my whole heart, that i'll never love him. but will i have the balls to not say "i love you" back when he finally says it to me? it would suck for him if i didn't say it back. i know in the beginning i won't say it back, but maybe he'll just wear me down..you know? what if he constantly tells me? i know him. i'll say to him something like, "i appreciate the courage it took for you to say that to me, but i just don't feel the same way." how many times will i be able to say that? not that many. he'll stick it out for as long as it takes.. i know he will. he'll wait. and wait and wait for me to love him back. but i won't, ever. who knows, maybe me never saying it back will be the thing to break us up. unrequited love really is a terrible thing.