i hate these feelings you know i hate them yet you throw them at me when i dont want them at times when it couldnt be worse you still do it despite of how i am feeling you dont care how much you hurt me you dont care at all i cry and you laugh you laugh and spit in my face pointing your ugly finger mouthing that i am doomed that i will never succeed only fail i will fail until i die i will never get out of this grave you you have dug for me i yell i scream for help but you wrap your hands over my mouth making sure no one will hear because secretly deep down somewhere you dont want to bother anyone around you so you learn to stay quiet to keep your mouth shut because in the end you know it wont matter if you live or die so why bother even trying at all and i say all this while staring in to my reflection that i hate looking at day after day because now all i see its shame for a life that i could have lived but never will be able to live up to love sarah