A couple of days after Mike’s business meeting we met with Kerri for couples counseling. As I've said, I had begun airing my grievances against Mike in the safety of therapy because I felt so comfortable talking with her. Today I brought up the business trip. Kerri had already met with Ashley the afternoon before, and they’d talked a little about it- why she’d attended and her behavior away from home. Mike was describing how obedient she’d been, with no acting out even though she was bored, and he went on to talk about her religious experience in church. Kerri gave him a bewildered glance and asked me what upset me about her going.

I said that mostly it was Mike doing what he wanted to without even bothering to listen to my point of view. I related how concerned I'd been about the heavy crowds and campground venue, worried that Ashley might take advantage of lack of supervision and a strange environment to run away. However, the fact that the week went smoothly showed she had behaved, so I was happy. I also said that in hindsight, maybe her going had been a good idea because, as Mike had predicted, it gave me a breather. I mentioned how the other kids had been good for me, and we had a wonderful time.

"That’s not what they told me," Mike interjected smugly. "They said you yelled at them all week."

My head shot up as if I'd been struck, and I was shocked into silence. This was simply not true. But all I could do at first was sit there in speechless confusion as Mike went on to relate how the children had said that the three days were awful, how mean I was and how they hoped Daddy didn’t leave them alone with me again.

Finally I found my voice, and in a very quiet but determined tone, I said, "That’s not true. We went to the beach. The park. The kids were good, and we had a lot of fun."

But Mike was shaking his head, a mildly amused smile on his face. I'd seen that smile before. It said 'poor Julie, you don't know what you're talking about'.

Panic-stricken, I turned to appeal to Kerri. None of it was true so I couldn’t figure out what Mike was up to. While I had made the kids clean up their rooms, it was not by raising my voice. In fact we had quite a lot of teasing and goofing around. Why had the kids said this to their father? Or, had they? With a sudden gulp of conviction, as if a small flame had burst forth, it suddenly occurred that Mike might be lying. On purpose.

Kerri was glancing between the two of us, unsure of what was going on. I mean, our stories were totally opposite, so what could she do? One of us was fabricating, and since she didn’t live in our pockets, she didn’t know which one. But I did, and the more I thought about it, the more sense it made. Don't tell me why, I just knew. And I was shocked and dismayed by what I saw, heard and felt. To the bottom of my toes, I knew Mike was lying, and with some secret purpose. He was trying to make me look bad in front of Kerri.

I didn’t say very much for the rest of the session after Mike’s announcement. Mostly I listened very carefully to what he was saying. I started picking up on a lot of innuendo, but the so-called sensible side of me was already trying to take over my brain and  questioning my discovery.  Like pushing against a sheet on a clothesline, it was rejecting any possibility of Mike telling fibs against me.  What good would making me seem like a liar do Mike?  Maybe he was just confused. Or overworked and overtired.  Maybe I was, and he really wasn't doing this on purpose. Because the possibility that my husband deliberately try to deceive Kerri and me for his own gain was too chilling.