well, yeah i still am haveing the party on the 29th. yeah, i feel rather stupid for the stuff i did in the past week or two. i tend to make a lot of bad desicions in my life, like cheating, even though that was a onetime thing, but right now im at a point in my life i dont really know what i want as far as relationships or anything of that nature, like i was single for over a year, and got used to it, then a girl comes along, wants to try a relationship out etc. well, things start to get serious and i start getting confused about everything, like i dont know how to react, or just im scared of what would come to it all. i dont really know what to think because everytime a relationship has gotten rather serious something has went terribly wrong, ive been cheated on, they leave cuz we went too fast, or i do something stupid and blow everything. its like come on, what the hell did i do to have this happen to me? i dont know anymore, i just want to leave, or find some one to help me out here. So many problems, so much stress i feel like im going to just cave in and run away. sheesh. i need some relief from all this. thats all for now laters