so alexs party was last nite... i just made him a card, i didnt know wat 2 get him. the whole time in the car (dad insisted on driving me so that he could meet him even tho i was supposed 2 get a ride w maria) hes lecturing me on sex drugs alcohol n trust n all that shit pissing me off, then after he finally drops that he brings up the food thing saying im loosing weight agian and just totally being an asshole and getting me all upset. so by the time we get there im in a really bad mood n about 2 cry. so alex takes me up 2 his room until i calm down then we go back downstairs 2 where sweety and elliot n andres n grace r. its not just alexs party its like his bday n sum party 4 his mom combined so theres tons of ppl everywhere... and alcohol. sweety n elliot had beers so i was drinking sum of sweetys even tho it was soo nasty. then finally maria shows up n we talk a little until she dissapears off sumwhere. like a little later she comes back n shes acting all crazy. we were sitting on the couch n she pulls me back in2 her and is whispering that she just drank 2 beers by herself n shes already a lil drunk. so we go over 2 elliot cuz hes playing all these old songs n right behind him is all the bottles of alcohol n stuff. so we get him 2 pour us sum, i dont remember what it was. jack daniels i think. sweety was laughing at us saying, god u guys are gonna be so loaded! i drank like half n started feeling all hot n dizzyish n sweety was like, that was fast, u weight like wat, 2 ounces? so im sitting on the floor in the corner n marias blabbering away 2 sweety n i look over at andres n he looks kinda pissed, prolly cuz maria wasnt talking 2 him, i dont really know y. so i start sliding myself over 2 talk 2 him but then maria like leaps off the chair n slides after me going, o no no, where do u think ur going? so we start rolling all over the floor laughing, entwining our fingers around each other.... but eventually she got up n went off somewherem so i laid there on the floor 4 awhile then slid back over 2 sweety. i was like, wheres maria, i want maria, n hes like, yea i used 2 want her 2 but i think in a different way then u, n i was like, mm i dont think so... so then we were just talking for awhile i dont remember exactly wat about, but then i looked over n saw one of alexs cats chewing on my flip flop. so i slid over to the cat talking 2 it like no kitty, dont eat my shoe, come back in the corner w me and sweety. and i started luring it back w my flipflops. it was coming too untill james went and scared it off so i got kinda sad. i went over 2 sarah and was like, wheres the cat? james scared the cat away, have u seen the cat? n shes like, god britta, wat r u on? ok ill help u find the cat. so i started crawling all around calling 4 the cat n sarah was following me. then i got 2 the bottom of the stairs n kayla n cody were standing there looking down at me n shes like, can u walk? is that why ur sliding all around? and im like, i really dont know. then elliot comes down and tells me 2 come upstairs so we get up there n he leads me in2 alexs room n as soon as i walk in i c maria n she comes stumbling 2wards me calling my name and i start bawling all the sudden and shes bawling 2 and we hug each other n fall on the floor. were laying there n im like don't cry, y r u crying? n shes like, i dont knoooow!!! and im like, dont be sad, i love u, and start kissing her cheek. then she stops crying and we look at each other n just start 2 giggle and then were laughing uncontrollabley and then just start making out. stoner n elliot n sarah n andres were all in there 2 n they were like, ok really u guys need 2 stop now. and im like, no, we really dont, and andres is like ok im leaving. she was sitting on me and was like im not squashing u am i? and im like, no dont worry its a good squash. i had on my jacket still n was like, its really hot in here! so i started trying 2 take it off but i couldnt so she unzipped it for me and threw it across the room like sum mad woman n started 2 pull my shirt down. but then elliot said something so she went over 2 him n was like, u know elliot i dont know y i never told u this b4, but i really like u. but he was really good tho, the whole night he refused 2 do anything w her saying he couldnt cuz she was drunk n didnt know wat she was doing. he was the only one who really took care of us the whole time 2. he was trying 2 stop her but she kept coming on 2 him and i was laying on the floor watching them and then i started sobbing, i was crying, u always leave me 4 guys, u hate me! and she left him really fast n falls back on me comforting me and saying no i dont hate u! i love u, ive always loved u, and i was like, i love u 2, im gonna break up w alex and go out w u, and shes like, ur so bad, and started kissing my neck again. she asked me, do u really love natashia? and i sighed, yea, but she hates me. and she told me, she doesnt hate u, she just doesnt know u. then she rolled off me and whispered 2 me, would u care if i give eliot head? and im like, no as long as u do it 2 me 2, and shes like, ok, and goes over 2 him but he wont let her. i kept calling out, ellllliot, maria wants u... and hes like, yea im sure she does. it was funny. then i was like, ummmm, i think i need 2 pee! and they asked, do u know where the bathroom is? and im like i dont think so. so elliot gets up 2 take me and maria pulls me back down. i ran my hands down her sides n told her, i have 2 go pee now. ill be right back, ok? n she gets all excited like, ok ill go pee w/ u! just like when i was w courtney! and we both went in2 the bathroom but elliot was like, no u 2 r 2 messed up 2 be alone together n pulled her out in2 the hallway n stood there waiting 4 me w the door cracked open. i was sitting there peeing and started singing out, dont listen 2 me pee, cuz then i wont be able 2 go! n hes like, im not listening. when i was done i looked out of the crack n maria sticks her head in n goes, u know britta if i had a penis i woulda fucked u a long time ago, and i was like, if i had a penis id fuck u 2, and she was like really?! then she came in and sits on the toilet 2 pee and eliots like ok britta get out and i was like no i cant, we have 2 both be in here b/c she has 2 pee and i have 2 wash my hands. then we went back in his room n did stuff for awhile i dont really remember wat, till kayla ran upstairs saying marias dad was here 2 pick us up. we were like, shit! wat are we gonna do? but her dad ended up staying awhile 2 talk 2 the older ppl so i called mom 2 say i was staying later 2 so i could ride back w them but she said, no ur dad just left 2 come pick u up. i was like, shit! so we chilled out in alexs room sum more. i was more sober by then but maria was still staggering around the room going on about how we had 2 kill our parents n all this shit. then she zoned out n sat on the bed singing 2 herself and wouldnt answer anyone. finally alex came upstairs saying dad was there. so i got my stuff and elliots tryna get maria 2 snap out of it. he was saying, maria, brittas leaving now, over n over. so i go over n give her a hug n say ill sneak out later 2 c if shes ok n 4 her 2 wait up 4 me, n shes all serious, saying good luck, dont get in trouble britta, and im like dont get caught either, n shes like if we get in trouble well run away, and im like i promise! and alex has no clue wats going on cuz we hadnt seen each other all nite n hes like, is there sumthing going on i should no about? n eliots like, its one of their first times being drunk. n alex goes, ohhh, and gives me this sad concerned look. i turn back 2 maria and she sticks her finger in my face going, dont get caught britta dont get caught, so i start laughing and lick her finger and start sucking on it and elliots like, ok its time 4 u 2 go now, pulling me away, but i get away and give maria another kiss and alex is like, ohh, ok now! and pulls me away again, which pissed me off. i tryed 2 be normal around dad in the car. i kept babbling about stuff hoping he wouldnt ask me anything. if he thought it was weird i was being all nice 2 him he musta just thought it was cuz i had a good time at the party and forgave him 4 earlier cuz he never mentioned it.