there's an encampment of some form of anger building up inside me. i dont like when things come out of nowhere, it's unexplained and most of the bloody time nagative. we dont seem to be able to communicate. i peak my head around the corner for the first time in existance and i see you and i still step forward. it's like one of those moments where you cant stop yourself before you make a stupid mistake, like calling someone the wrong name when you know they'll take it personally. so we're walking head on, and i'm not even sure why you're present. this area, this environement, this realm has nothing to do with you. it doesnt have much to do with me either, but i have good reason, i have agenda, i have a freshman locker. you're step isnt solid, your weak smile is just a defeated moment to make yourself feel better. so there's awkwardness, like recent days. there's this tough time where i'm trying to figure out if i really want this to be ok, or if i want to drag on the frustrations. forgive and forget? i've never been good at that, i've never been good at doing that giving in thing. so you're doubting me and i'm annoyed by your doubt and this just isnt flowing. this just isnt working. this just isnt happening. so we walk away from each other and i curse the something that made it this way. i dont understand. and maybe you think He is getting me out of your life for good reason? maybe you need to lose friends to make the right ones? i personally think that's a load of crap. i personally think that all that you're currently standing for is something that you dont ultimately understand. and shit...forgive me for being a little closed off. this should be something that you just let me go about. something that you dont try. something that YOU give into and just respect my frustrations, accept my desicion, respect my ways and outlooks, because that's what i do for you.