Yesterday was the worst day I've had in awhile. English was fine, break was fine, biology was fine, band was fine, lunch. I can't stand seeing 2 people so close. Especially when one is your ex-boyfriend and you don't like him anymore but just didn't expect him to move on so quickly. Then I saw Zach. And he was going the other way so no hug. :( In tech lit Mr.Kellogg made fun of me in front of the whole class. It was NOT the day for him to do that. So school is over, I walk home with a few tears on my face. I go home and cry. I go to the band room to pick up my clarinet but the door is locked (we had a sub) so we have to sit and wait. All these people come. I start crying nonstop and I have no clue why. Then they call me emo, ask what's wrong, and just leave. Skylar didn't leave though. He walked with me to get my clarinet and tried to make sure I'd be ok. So I came home and wouldn't stop crying. Amanda came over and saw me like this for the first time I think. But she helped take my mind off things. So then I talked to my new friend Sean on the phone for awhile and got ready for the dance. I was thinking about giving my ticket to Tara and not going because my eyes felt puffy from crying and I knew it would suck. But I went. Well I was right, it did suck. I didn't dance with anyone, except Rachel because skylar wouldn't dance with either of us so we danced together. Awkward since I barely know her. Marissa (the one who said she didn't want to ditch us for her boyfriend) was glued to him. It was kind of sick watching her with him. And Tara had to dance with Tyler. And Skylar wasn't happy because Rachel and him were fighting. So around 10:25 skylar and I went outside and just talked. Then Rachel came out and dragged him around the corner to argue with him. Two seperate strangers asked me if I was ok because I was sitting there by myself. Is it always so obvious? I guess so. But I told them I was just waiting for my friend. Then I went into the bathroom and called amanda and started crying and she told me I should go home. So I went up to marissa and told her to find her own ride home. Skylar & Rachel were leaving at the same time as me but I didn't say good bye. And apparently Marissa went home like right after me. But I almost didn't go home. I sat and cried for awhile in the dark. I was going to run. I knew that going home would only cause more pain. Earlier my mom had yelled at me demanding an answer for why I was crying but I didn't know so I couldn't tell her. Then she told my dad and he yelled at me too and I'm sick of the screaming. I knew I would be asked again. (Which I was and was yelled at and now I'm in trouble and probably can't go to Skylar's party) But I knew I couldn't run away because I had no jacket and no money. So I walked home. I still can't decide whether it's worth it to go to Skylar's or not. I probably won't have fun and will be yet again seperated from the group since I'm not in drumline. I'll probably start crying and lock myself in the bathroom and get pity hugs (like last night) and just go home. So I don't see the point in even going. But I might anyway. Just because Skylar had an awful birthday and I want him to feel better. Not like I could make him feel any better, only Tara could do that. Why won't David stop calling me? He's so stupid. I can't believe he hasn't taken the hint yet. I'm going to go now.