Are you in? She listens to incubus constantly now. Mostly "I miss you" and she thinks she realized why. She thinks she misses Gus more than she knows. Why else would she have been so extraordinarily happy when she saw him the other day? She wrote in geometry: "Sometimes I wonder what it would be like to have her life. Sometimes I hate how she acts but then I realize how nice she is. She wants to fly Isn't afraid to die. She'd like to jump But hears her heart thump. She stands on the edge Of the balcony ledge. And so soon as a car stalls She jumps and f a l l s. Wide awake Her mom and dad ache. The pain they go through All because she flew. It wasn't about to last And now it's in the past." She thinks it looked better on paper. How she arranged it all. Oh god. Here she goes again. LIstening to it on repeat. Her mother flipped her off today. She didn't do much to aggravate her either. She certainly didn't mean to. She wishes she could have met that boy today. Charlie. Such a nice name. Such a nice boy.