nothing is there. no thoughts. no feelings. just empty space.

yet, i can feel everything. love, hate, want, desire, sorrow, desolation. I don't know how to control them all. My head over flows, my heart throbs, my body trembles, my stomach hurls.

I need comfort. I need to be held. I'm afraid of what will happen. What is happening? Tears come to my eyes in fear. She feels so alone.

She is helpless. She needs someone to rescue her, a hero. She knows who she wants, she also knows that she can't have him. That makes her worse. The only one she wants to save her won't. What will happen to her if she can't be saved? Can she last this night alone? Will something more powerful than her own will take over? Her body convulses on the bed, won't someone hold her. The tears stream down her face, won't someone wipe them away. Her lungs struggle to keep air, won't someone calm her down.

Why is she like this?

I don't know why I like him so much. I have freedom, why is my heart set? Or is it set? Maybe it just wants someone to hold. But why is it choosing him so much over the others? Perhaps its because I've slept next to him for two nights and nothing has happened. I shouldn't expect anything to happen, after all, who am I?

She wants to force him into her arms. She wants him in her life. She needs him there. She will try her hardest to get him there.

I know its best to back off, but I can't. I want to smother him. I got very jealous the last two nights. I did take solace in knowing that he didn't touch her though.

He will belong to her. He will belong to her. He will belong to her.

Maybe I just need to get fucked.

Maybe she just needs to get fucked.

89