I miss having a hand to hold (not like we did that very often anyway). Its nice to have lots of different men to have crushes on and flirt with. But sometimes, I just want to feel needed. It can be hard being independent. I don't need a man to occupy my time, but want someone there to make me feel special once in a while. I need a bed warmer. Guy said he'd bring me out to California. I must be doing something right if he wants to pay for me to visit after only seeing me once. Nate is fantastic. I drunkenly told him I had a crush on him. His reply wasn't what I wanted to hear. Yet, he keeps going? If you don't really want a relationship why are you acting like you do? Tyler is a cool kid. We kinda did things backwards though. Met, made out, slept in his bed, then talked about relationships. All within two days. Hah. Whatever. Whenever I get this way, all I really need is a one-night stand. Makes me feel better usually. Fucking men, why do we need them so badly? I guess its kind of hard to get fucked if you don't have them. They have to be good for something, might as well be for fucking. I love my diary. I used to be careful about what I put in it. I didn't want some people to read things. But fuck it, its mine. If people don't want to see what it says then they shouldn't read it. I was hesitant about this entry, how high school do I sound talking about men? haha. But should I care? no =)