Well I dont know what to think anymore, I miss him and I love him but at the same time I just cant stand him. I dont know my heads going in a millions different places. I still dont understand how you can tell some you love them over and over again but the minute they do something wrong all that love is gone. But at the same time I dont know how I could do what I did to him, I love him so much but I still did it I really wish I could remember what I was thinking. I am the worse person. I through my life with him away, and I dont think I could ever get that back. I dont know what to do should I move on or should I wait and see if I could ever get him back, he deservers so much better then me maybe I should just move on and let him be happy with some one that’s good enough for him but in my eyes no one is good enough for him. Some one will make him happy one day though and I hope that person never does what I did because to lose him is to lose your whole world, well in my eyes. I should probably just leave him alone but at the same time I don’t want to give up because I need him, he helped me through so much, I don’t know what I’m going to do without him.