Aloof is a funny word. I'm still awake. And I'm really fucking bored. And there is NOTHING to do. I've already dried and straightened my hair, I have white strips on my teeth right now, and I think Jordan's about to explain something to me. Eshk. Not cool. Robbie's online. I wuna talk to him. But I really don't think he wants to talk now. Or ever. And that really sucks. We've gone from fuck buddies, to boyfriend/girlfriend, to pretty much hating eachother, to being like best friends, to occasionally hooking up, and now to like, pretty much acquaintances, if that. We don't talk any more. Its like, I bother him by living if hes busy. But when there's nothing else for him to do and if he's sitting at home and he wants to hook up, HEY KRISTIE WHATS UP? And even if I'm doing something, I'll usually stop what I'm doing to hang out with him. And he knows that. Ha.. Looks like I got fucked over, yet again. And at this point, I'm starting to think its never guna end. Probably because it's not. But what the fuck am I supposed to do? What the fuck can I do? Nothing, except sit back and watch everything crash and burn. Awesome. But yeah, I don't feel like thinking about it anymore. It's not guna go away, just kinda, left alone for a little while. It never goes away. I lied. I'm not guna stop thinking about it. Because I can't. And I just thought of something. It sounds super gay, but uh.. Yeah. When you meet someone you care about and that makes an impact on your life, its like you're a tree and they carve their name or something into you. And you keep growing with that piece of them and you can never forget about it because it's always guna be there. Until you die and get cremated or burried. And when you die and whatnot, it's like a tree dying and decaying or getting made into something else. And it sucks. I mean, it can be cool sometimes because you think about all the good times and everything, but it sucks because you don't have good times anymore; Only memories. And as much fun as it was, theres usually alot of pain. And its kinda shitty that you can't remember the good without the bad because everything has been carved into you and you're never guna forget it until you die. Iduno if it makes as much sense now that I put it into words, but it made alot of sense in my head. But.. Whatever. This isn't going anywhere. It's only wasting time. And I'm babbling too. Sorry. I'm going. Later.