It's been quite awhile since I've updated this. Sometimes when I read the old things I've posted I'm surprised at the person I used to be, surprised at how I used to think. I don't think a person ever completely changes. No, they don't. I think that there will always be a reflection, a "shadow" if you will, of who they used to be, forever inside of them.

I can happily say that the person who I was, is no longer who I am. I still am the same person I've always been, but in the five or six years that have passed since then, I've grown. Gained a lot more intelligence, gained a whole hell of a lot more street-smarts and common sense to boot. I can consider myself lucky and blessed that I was able to grow up, and it's sad that some people still haven't.

I miss the Shadow Clan sometimes. I miss what it represented, and what it used to mean to me. Something I've come to accept is that, things seldom remain the same. Things usually never stay the way you love and remember them as; they usually change and grow (sometimes not for the better) and although it sucks and it hurts, you have to know when to let go.
I physically and mentally let go of it a long time ago, but my heart sort of kept it, like some fond distant memory. Sometimes when I have problems I still get a fleeting thought/desire to go back to the Shadow Clan for help and advice; then I realize that it's done with. It wasn't as I remembered it. I'm not the same dumb fourteen year old boy who thought that we were all some big family. It would have been better if everyone stayed in character, never got too attached. But whatever.

I'm now engaged. Set to be married in two years, so that's fantastic. The guy I'm with is the most wonderful, loving, and caring boyfriend anybody could ever ask for. I'm living the American Dream. I'm happy.
I can honestly say without the Shadow Clan my teenage years would have sucked so much more. It was nice having people who I could relate to, and who could guide me on the right path.

Even if none of them will see this.

Thank you Katey, Kayla, and Mike. You all looked out for me, and I appreciate everything you all taught me.