Crying isn't a bad thing. it's acctually healthy.. just like puking is after a long night of binge drinking. so for those 40 minutes, I wrapped myself with my own arms in the corner of my cold dim room and cried like a little baby. I can't remember the last time I ever cried like that. I cried so loud and so hard I felt my nose would come apart from my face. and it wasn't because I was sad, no. it was because of all the overwhelmness that took over my body. I had never said it out loud. Those words... words I've feared for many years. I guess it sounds different when you actually hear yourself say them instead of hearing them in your head. "I love him" Now it feels so good to say it... So when I was done I looked at myself in the mirror, my eyes were so swelled and puffy it looked like they didn't belong to the rest of my face... Then that other familiar feeling set in.. I realized how scared I was to ever losing this feeling... to ever losing him. so I cried.