I dont want to go off to college.. mostly bc I dont know what I want to do in life, I just know that I want to do something with video production or graphic design...and I want to go to the art insitute to learn that stuff...thing is its too much money...how am I gonna afford to pay off the loans...my dad says he will help me if he if he sells part of the property of the house as long as Im sure that I know what Im doing and is this what I want to do...and Im afraid to screw up bc if I do...my ass if dead...then to make matters worse in my life...Im afraid of losing Cody...I dont want June 1 to come...bc thats the day we graduate....as soon we graduate hes going to mexico with Garrett and Garrett's family...then as soon as they get back...Garrett and Cody are going to be leaving to go to the art insitute...I dont think Im even going to see Cody on or for my birthday....I DO NOT WANT JULY 4 TO COME!!! I DO NOT WANT TO BE 18!!!!!!!!!!!!! but yea as soon as he starts school...I deffently wont be able to see him...he will be so busy and cuaght up in school and once I move down there which will be in oct I'll be busy at the Art Insitute...Im afraid....i fucken wish I had a mom...i just fucken wish I had someone to talk to that I can fucken count on who fucken hates cody bc they got on thier nerves...look im sorry he isnt perfect like garrett!! i just need to get away from this place...i need a break or something...before something really bad happens