Feeling: teenagery Bipolar soul My emotions a whirlwind of confusion and fury Abstruse situations come from all sides Pushing and pulling my mind into senseless oblivion Burning and bending my thoughts into a stew of insanity Choking and freeing my emotions until I can no longer feel my heartbeat I finally feel loved At the expense of another I gain a new friend At the cost of the other And so I am stuck here Decisions, decisions I cannot see through this Confusing new visions My words start to flow With a rhyme and a reason But I'm so aloof I've been caught out of season Freeing myself from the constraints of the written word I breathe Remembering I am loved I matter I am beautiful I am a beautiful mistake. I flounder Through my joy I wander Aimless Through fields of bitter sorrow And yellow flowers Peacefully I sit alone Wishing for others To bring the chaos In the confusion I silently pray Only for time away from the crowds My soul A contradiction Confused Where all is perfectly clear And understanding the unknown A walking contradiction I am. Neat rhyme schemes Rhythmic perfection Blowing in the wind As I say goodnight To this world Of perfect imperfection And the clarity of it's confusion. Well, I had to conclude that last one abruptly... My grandma got home... Anyway, this is all about how great the bipolar confusion of being me as a teenager is. So joy to the world. It's also kind of about this guy I have a mutual crush on, who is going out with a girl I hope to become better friends with, and is about to break up with her... So I gotta choose: go out with dream guy, or befriend dream girl... Well, I just don't know. Doesn't matter though. I'll probably get kicked out and have to move in with my mom pretty soon anyway. I like this though. And although I say I hate myself for stealing her boyfriend, I really don't... It's weird, and I hate myself for not hating myself. Anyway, blarghedy blargh blargh... :) I like these mixed up emotions. Funner than all hell. Goodnight everyone. ~ Beth