Well, I actually got to drive today. My dad took me out around the house and yard and gave me a whole big lesson any everything. Parking, backing up, turn signals, even parallel parking. it was kinda cool. stressful! never drove before really. I did really good though! I've been watching my brother when he drives and learning that way, so I didn't hit anything and I backed up about 100 yards up our driveway almost perfectly. I think I'll do pretty good when I turn 16. I finally finished my diary! It's so beauty-full! Hopefully I'll remember to write in it. I hate how I never have time to anything for myself. I feel like everyone has just up and decided to grab a limb and pull. Well, I think I've run out of limbs. What are they going to pull next? eww. do I even want to know? I got the "Anthem" stuck in my head. Also known as "The Band Bus Theme Song" and "The Real Alma Mater". Record companies chose to call it "What's Your Fantasy". You know: "What's Your Fantasy" (feat. Shawna) [Ludacris] Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah Give it to me now, give it to me now Give it to me now, give it to me now [Shawna] Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah Give it to me now, give it to me now Give it to me now.. [Chorus: Ludacris, then Shawna *2X*] I wanna, li-li-li-lick you from yo' head to yo' toes And I wanna, move from the bed down to the down to the to the flo' Then I wanna, ahh ahh - you make it so good I don't wanna leave But I gotta, kn-kn-kn-know what-what's your fan-ta-ta-sy [Ludacris] I wanna get you in the Georgia Dome on the fifty yard line While the Dirty Birds kick for t'ree And if you like in the club we can do it In the DJ booth or in the back of the V.I.P. Whipped cream with cherries and strawberries on top Lick it don't stop, keep the door locked don't knock while the boat rock We go-bots and robots so they gotta wait til the show stop Or how 'bout on the beach with black sand Lick up your thigh then call me the Pac Man Table top or just give me a lap dance The Rock to the Park to the Point to the Flatlands That man Ludacris (woo) in the public bathroom Or in back of a classroom How ever you want it lover lover gonna tap that ass soon See I cast 'em and I past 'em get a tight grip and I grasp 'em I flash 'em and out last 'em And if ain't good then I trash 'em while you stash 'em I'll let 'em free And the tell me what they fantasy Like up on the roof roof tell yo boyfriend not to be mad at me [Chorus] [Ludacris] I wanna get you in the bath tub With the candle lit you give it up till they go out Or we can do it on stage of the Ludacris concert Cause you know I got sold out Or red carpet dick could just roll out Go 'head and scream you can't hold out We can do it in the pouring rain Runnin the train when it's hot or cold out How 'bout in the library on top of books But you can't be too loud You wanna make a brother beg for it Give me TLC 'cause you know I be too proud We can do it in the white house Tryna make them turn the lights out Champaign with my campaign let me do the damn thing What's my name, what's my name, what's my name a sauna, jacuzzi In the back row at the movie You can stratch my back and rule me You can push me or just pull me On hay in middle of the barn (woo) rose pedals on the silk sheets uh Eating fresh fruits sweep yo woman right off her feet [Chorus] [Ludacris] I wanna get you in the back seat windows up That's the way you like to fuck, clogged up fog alert Rip the pants and rip the shirt, ruff sex make it hurt In the garden all in the dirt Roll around Georgia Brown that's the way I like it twerk Legs jerk, overworked, underpaid but don't be afraid In the sun or up in the shade On the top of my escalade Maybe your girl and my friend can trade; tag team, off the ropes! On the ocean or in the boat! Factories or on hundred spokes! What about up in the candy sto' that chocolate chocolate make it melt Whips and chains, handcuffs, smack a little booty up with my belt Scream help play my game; dracula man I'll get my fangs Horseback and I'll get my reigns, school teacher let me get my grades [Chorus - repeat 4X] *will love this song till the day our band bus rides with Amanda, Justine, and Sam end* (hopefully never). There are few things that can cheer me up nowadays, but that always seems to be one of them. I remember the one day after school when we stayed after before the football game: Nikki and Tyler were sitting against the wall in the gym lobby and me, Justine, and Amanda were sitting on a folded up table in front of the soda machine. Amanda had her cd player and the three of us were listening to "What's Your Fantasy" and singing along really loud and in the middle of the chorus, some guy walks in, gives us a really weird look, and gets a soda from across the lobby! We busted out laughing! It was *the* greatest after school band moment ever! Had to be there! Kinda a little depressed now, though. Amanda and Chris are going out. Well, Chris and I have an interesting history. First time we went out, he was showing off to his friends and made up little stories about us. I found out and broke up with him. Second time, I was really stressed, he was too clingy, I got pissed off and dumped him. No matter how much we have hated each other at times, when we're not together, we are best friends. Anyway, Amanda and Chris are going out. Chris likes Amanda, Amanda is just flattered and full of herself. She does like him though . . .maybe . . .anyway, every chance she gets, she ignores him or ditches him to be with one of her friends. She's done that before and then it's me left with Chris to talk. Well, last night at the Numedia Carnival, Chris talked to Alyssa Carl for 2 minutes and Amanda got pissed off at him. When I got there, Chris and I got to talking for about a minute while walking around the baseball field, and Amanda decided to run off with Steph about 100 yards and talk on their own. this continued forever. Amanda and Steph running off, walking fast, hiding behind trash cans. I finally went to Amanda and asked her why she was trying to ditch Chris. She didn't say anything, but made more of an effort to stop. Towards the beginning of the carnival, Amanda and Steph were talking about something and Amanda said, "Do you second it?". Steph said yeah, they told Justin to say he thirds it. he did. they asked me if I fourthed it. I said no because they were probably talking about me. Chris never gave an answer. None of us knew what was going on. Anyway, Amanda finally told what it was she said and it was that she thought Chris and I looked good together. When Justine was walking around with us, Amanda asked her and she agreed. Well, right now, that makes me want to cry. I miss Chris. He is deefinately not as much of a jerk as he was before, but the problem is, if we ever get a chance to go out again, I don't know if we could make it work. We are perfect as friends, but more? who knows if it'll ever work. But Chris . . . he's my anchor, he's my Dawson. He's the guy I will always care about. Amanda ran off with Steph and Chris got mad and sat down and told me to sit down too (thinking back *heart flutter, flutter*) so I did, and they got pissed off and sat down 100 feet away for about 10 minutes, then stood up and took another lap. Chris and I got to talking, all alone in the dark, kind of nice. It made me feel close to him again. When we met up with Steph and Amanda again, we sat down and talked and looked at the stars, all four of us. It hurt though because amanda was upset and Chris just sat there holding her. I always wanted that from him. I guess what I got was better though. He can actually talk to me. anyway, I don't want to get attached to him because there's not a chance now. he's got someone. It was nice though.