aahhh...to see this wonderful and simple site that housed the ramblings the (un)complicated life a teen... so much has happened since my last entry. syet! i talk as if i aged a decade or two. its just that...being an adult and entering the 'real' world...suddenly i wanna go back in being a teen with no worries in the world. its just the beginning, and im having doubts and im being indecisive as ever. gods, i hate being a adult now... but hey, like i said its just the start. fresh graduate. registered nurse. is that the profession i wanna do in life? can i handle the responsibility of holding a person's life in my hands, caring for them? so many questions..i know i am capable of doing it, the question is, am i going to love the career for the rest of my life? whew. so serious. despite all that nothing much changed in me. lazy as ever. and crazybeautiful in and out. chorva!

right, so we've finally pushed through with our plan that has been concocting since 1st sem last year: roadtrip to la union, then to ilocos. we did everything as we had planned, we stayed at our grandparents' house in la union, then went to ilocos norte to meet our tropa, jhing, who lives there, to take us to Pagudpud, the so-called "boracay" of the north. sounds like real fun, right? you have no idea. but there's the best and the worst part of this little adventure, and i guess i'm going for the best first, since mas marami sya kesa sa worst. BEST: the trip to la union. nauna ako umalis with ate may. nagcommute lang kami while the others traveled by car. it was my first time traveling to la union without my parents! and i was a bit skeptical as to how we (me and my friends) are going to be received by my relatives there. i was so ashamed and grateful for their efforts and hospitality. the beach. oh yeah. i can still picture the whole place. the white-ish, fine sand, the waves, the sunset... thanks to jhing and her tito everything went smoothly. hindi kami nahirapan. it was so much fun. Saud resort is perfect. i WILL return to that place. bonding with the star of the trip-Anne. she was the reason that i've made so much effort in letting them stay in our province kahit hindi naman ako lagi andun, just because it's her birthday and of course i want her to enjoy our trip. we went straight to the beach with our traveling clothes on! haha we waited until the sunset before going out of the water and then we just chilled at the seashore. man, heaven talaga ang part na yon, i will never forget that moment. we drank ourselves silly with tequila, and waited the clock to strike twelve and greet her happy birthday. i think we did that, nga lang, we're too much intoxicated to care. hiking to kabigan falls. i am now officially a nature lover! we hiked for 1.5 km, i almost lost one of havaianas slipper sa pagtawid sa mga ilog, my feet were sore, and in the end, it was pure heaven. the scenery was awesome. beyond words. haha OA na siguro ako but there's really not enough words to describe it. i am that AWED. haha.i just wish i could have so much opportunity to go to different places and see the sights and scenery they can offer. and i even drank the water. definitely better than mineral water. bilib din ako sa havs ko. they never failed me,kahit naputikan na at lahat. ano pa...oh, lastly, going back to manila by commute again! this time, with a classmate. Anne and co. are planning to go to baguio pa(which unfortunately didn't happen, because they ran out of money, sad), so nagpaiwan kami ni kishy sa laoag, where jhing had to see us off the bus. i really feel so responsible and an adult for the first time! haha. i feel happy that my parents are trusting me that much na these days. cause if they let me be this way, i'll definitely learn to be more responsible for myself. .............and now the 2 worst part of the journey. i really don;t want to put it here myself, but i guess i have to. here goes. WORST 1. Anne's friends. oh no, not the ELYA, her highschool friends. i wouldn't say much about them here, but let's just say na nagkamali si anne na pagsamahin and tropa niya from imus, then kami, her college friends in an outing. they were that awful and im thanking the gods na na-ejoy ko padin ang roadtrip, cause there's this saying that in a journey,no matter where you go, you wouldn't enjoy everything if you're not enjoying the company you're in. and i believe that's right.good thing i'm THAT good in ignoring things i don't want to notice. 2. DIGICAM. that's the worst thing that's been putting me down in the whole trip. all i have is memories, but i want pictures dammit, and i want myself IN them! so there. i just git back home, and i'm ready to sleep after posting this. and oh, im definitely going back to Pagudpud.

january 17, 2008 kung gano ka-tahimik yung bday celebration ko yesterday, tonight made up for it. TRIBES/TRIBU is now the place for worship for us! haha. well, not really, but the place was a blast! after our 8-3 class, con, dom, rator, kishy, bethle, weh and i went to ruins to shop for our green shirt ( yeah tuloy na tuloy ang planong gumawa ng group shirt namen!) unfortunately, apat lng kameng nkabili. then we headed to tribu na without betz and weh (you can guess why:boyfriends.), and it was one of the best drinking session ever. if you're ever been to tribu you can share my enthusiasm in praising the place. the great thing was we got the best place, where we drank, ate, talked and laughed ourselves out. Mindoro Sling smelled like bubblegum, and tasted heaven. the main highlight of this little get-together was the SHESHA. yeah, that's our new God! haha. just kidding. it was so addictive it there wasn't any illegal chemicals in it. we're definitely planning to return. may two months pang celebration in order, con and dom's birthdays. as of now, NAPAKARAMI nameng plano, i dnt even know where to start. haha. but first things first, we have to buy havaianas and THEN, start saving up for the ultimate summer vacation: LA UNION, ILOCOS,then BAGIUO. nice, eh? im just hoping that we'll get to fulfill it. masarap talaga gumimik pag may kotse! woohoo! and yeah, im 20 years old now.yay.

geez! happy christmas to all and to this blog of mine! haha wow i really always forgot this little thing. but let's see, what's happened to me so far? second semester, as always, was a bit on the downside for me ever since. i don't know. there's just something in the atmosphere, about the 2nd half of the school year thats making me a bit uneasy. it's the people. oh god, not again. haha. well, it's been a busy holiday for me. from nonstop night shift duties to bars to christmas parties.... colored my hair, gained few (more??) pounds, had MUMPS! oh that was miserable, i missed the prelim exams. and as usual, my tardiness to attend classes... i'll not talk about the summary of my whole year yet, that's reserved for the new year's entry.. oh, and the band? its a mere illusion now.

sa tinagal-tinagal kong hindi nag-update, nakalimutan ko na and mga nangyari.haha.oh well. let me summarize things up.hospital duty.busy as a beehive.sundae syndrome, going downhill. we're trying to form a 'new' band, hence, by not letting our 'drummer' know about our practices. stuck kasi kame at walang progress. yun at yun lang. then hindi pa xa nakikinig. she's not really into the band. we're almost given up on the band ourselves, pero inaalala namen yung mga sacrifice namen at effort ng mga taong tumulong samen. they believed in our determination and we dnt want to dissapoint them by suddenly giving up. it's just not right. we've been practising lately, without, the drummer, and the lead. gusto ko na ngae din magtampo sa leadista namen, and i want to question her interest in the band, atfer-all, xa tong eager na eager sa umpisa. things are like yo-yo, nothing's stable anymore. on the good side, someone actually wants to include in a gig-read that line again, i dare you.apparently,tita cherry was fsacinated by our band-an all-girl band, at gusto kame isali sa gig nila this coming saturday(yes, you read it right). and so, here's the dilemma. we're amateurs. totally. but we want the exposure, we want the experience, just once, before we finally lose hope and give up on the band itself. and the plan is, we'll do it, but our mentors (yes, the drummer and the guitar coach) would be part of the band, replacing the missing original members. i knew-the rest of the remaining original band knew that it would be a blast, but we dnt know if they'll agree, and all will unfold tomorrow, in our practice.. on the whole, things are still murky, but there's the flicker of hope. we really want this. we do. we just hope the rest of our esteemed bandmates shares the same passion. one could only hope.

haven't updated in a while, but i saved this in my pc..Ü august 3 it was declared that highschool and college has no class, so con, dom, rator and I went to the mall to watch ouija (which was sadly, not good enough ;c). but we had fun together fisrt time ng tropang el na lumabas.haha. na pa picture kami, which was fun too. met up with wendy, leeye's dorm mate, played at tom's world for a bit, then at centerstage, kung saan ako lang ang kumanta. jec came and sabay umuwi with rator, wendy and leeyen ate while anne waited for her 'boyfriend' dahil sabay daw sila uuwi. so yun. over-all, it was fun, but it left my pockets empty, again. but iot was quite worth it. August 7 one of the most unforgettable days--first exposure to delivery room! our group was almost disappointed dahil last two days na namen yun sa area and wala pa kami ni isang case. luckily, yung nag pa prenatal check up na 35 weeks eh nag start na maglabor.usually sa mga ganuns situations ni re-refer sa hospital dahil pre term, but then nag pasign n lng ng waver dahil di na aabutin. so there! di ko talaga expected yun, and i was thrilled and exhilirated at the whole experience. anim lng kami so tatlo lng ang pwedeng pumasok sa loob. i was one of the lucky three, and i did the cord dressing, pinakamabusisi na part. but i really enjoyed, the baby boy was soooo cute and i adored him to pieces. and it really a lucky day dahil birthday ngayon ni barney.what a busy, rainy day. nagpang-abot din ang group6 and 7. what a reunion. haha.and i was 1hour and 30 minutes late, ewan ko kung bakit. haha. blame me. August 8 i tried to make up for the yesterday's tardiness at sinuong namin ni friend ang ulan at baha sa muntinlupa. imagine the two us standing on the clinic's door like soaking wet, while the midwife's husband was ushering us inside the delivery room dahil may manganganak na. so super madali kami ni friend, dom and rator was already there, but nevertheless, the four of us helped. cord dress si dom, naging handle si rator at ako and naging assist dahil late si mark. episiotomy and episiorraphy ang nangyari kay mommy while meconium stain si baby gurl. i had to massage the mother's uterus and comfort her habang tinatahian xa. nagamit naman si kirat(the doll i bought yesterday at toy kingdom with jec) na naging el kirat na.haha. and umuwi kami ng 12 dahil suspended ang class pla pero tinuloy parin namen dahil nga sa case. it was a good day, pwera lng sa lecheng ulan na binasa kaming lahat. happy!

july 24-25 sumasang-ayon talaga ang panahon sa G-Spot. two days in a row na kumpleto and banda with our two mentors, dheniz and vince for the drums and guitar. we couldn't thank them enough for the effort and willingness to waste their time onus amateurs.but today was a good practice. super may progress na talaga. sunud-sunod yung tugtog namen though hindi pa talaga malinis dahil may problem pa din kame sa coordination and timing, but all was well. and it was fun, too. kahapon dumeretso kami sa foodshop to drink and celebrate a little, together with anne's boytoy(haha super L!) and wey, na sinumpong ng topak. wala sya ngayon which was good dahil walang magulo, walang feeling, walang mayabang, at walang negative sa practice. nga lng kanina pissed off ako kay meg. ngaon ko lng talaga totally nakikita yung ugali niyang maraming kinakaayawan ng tao. i was used to being confided by others na ayaw nila kay meg. now i share the same feelings. last day na namen sa community kanina, may pumasok na baliw ata dun na ngkukunwaring buntis xa. scary. it was quite sad na tapos na kame sa area na yun, at nakatuwa dahil sa last day ko talagang nakausap ng matino yung kinaiinisan ko sa kabilang group. as in chika talaga. haha. may wheels ulet kanina, kai ngpa-gas, tas sa garahe ule kme ngpractice. as in wala talaga akong ipon ngayon. now im beggining to feel na worth it yung pagod at sacrifices namen lahat, na yung away between sameng magkakaibigan nung isang araw ay kelangan din pala para maayos kami. at xmpre super grateful talaga ako sa nagtuturo samen na ultimo set-up at pagtotono sila gumagawa. para lng kmeng mga batang pinaglalaro ng mga magulang sa inayos na bahay-bahayan. at hindi naman parang last will and testament tong pinagsusulat ko dito.haha.hay. basta. new experience talaga toh. it changed my boring routine in life.

akala namen half day kame ngayon kasi nga SONA diba, bit we were given a loooooong break, with assignment, then we're to meet back at the health towere at 4 to check for attendance. so i went home to do the asid assignnment and went back to school para i-meet cna nathz and vince...met up with anne and khit, then cab, medyo toxic cause we're been worried on how ditch cab, kasi nga he's our competition, pero wala kaming mapagpractice-an so we relied on his help and went to a studio to practice. it was okay, magaling talaga pumalo si cab, though nahiya kami cause he's competition and we're so amatuers and needed help, but it went okay. nga lng, inaway namen si meg, our supposed to be dummer. pangalawang beses na niya toh ginawa samen. she kept on saying she wanted this as much as do pero ayun, mas pipiliin pa niya si wey na ARAW-ARAW niyang nakikita kesa mag sacrifice ng konti para sa practice na neve naman tlagang naging concrete, laging on the spot, at pabago-bago and decision. di man lng niya abot ang level ng determination at dedication nameng lahat dahil madami kaming lakad at rules at pagod na ininda para lng mkpgprcatice. she's so defensive at pinrangka na namen xa. (well, with the help of alcohol, nag inuman kami nia nathz sa fudshop aftr ng practice). hindi ko na alam kung anung mangya2ri samen, but im sure that im still all for it. sa pagod at hirap ba naman na ginawa ko. i wont let this beginning end in a total waste. not if i can't help it.

this day has been...interesting. may pasok kme kahit linggo, general practice ng capping, kaya super late nako, kahit dumating mga bisita namen dahil pauwi na si amang sa states.. aun pagtapos ng practice na mejo ok naman, punta kami sa bluecourt sa may amin to watch the basketball game, boys of our section versus section Q ata. and my gosh, super L na naman ako kay james.wahahaha dami din fafa pero xmpre loyal aku.haha. astig nga apat kme gurl nanuod si con, dom, ako(vibe) at si rator, na naglaro din, the only gurl sa mga ballers.and may auto kami, super haba ng hair namen! pinaglaro lng namen si rator then umalis din kame(tambak kase section namen haha) then sa pilar na kina khit to practice. di pwde si meg so apat na gurls lng kame. on the spot namen pinuntahan si vince sa happyville para magpaturo. then punta kame sa bahay nila vince with his cousin pao.super tutotial nga bassist din kasi si pao. ayun binaba namen si naths sa southland, then nag shawarma kami courtesy of khit. tambay konti kina khit then sibat na kami ni anne. in short, past ten nako nakauwi, which is lucky for me, okay lng sa parents ko. haha. honestly, i think we're making progress. dedication and determination lng tlga para maaus. kung hindi...then..bahala na si batman.haha

im still depressed over the fact our band cannot retain our name, G-Spot. its girl spots, you know. haha finished the super grueling prelim exams, and waited at mcdo for an eternity for our "band" to be completed. went to kit's house and settled for what to play. in short it was SO TIRING, ANNOYING, TIRING..whatever..just...some people are plain pain in the arses...and it weighed me down and stressed me....gah.. it's good to see that almost all of us are determined to see through this band. of course there are professional help, haha. im quite glad. though for now, im beat.

ah, this is a fairly busy week, or weeks, this month of july. wala na nga akong time to even update my blog, super madali na lang, and it lack details. well, to sum it all up, this first one a half month of 1st sem has been full of babies and pregnant moms, injections,infuriating *other* groupmates, laughter, perverted girlfriends, hidden desires, friend-turned-admirers,harry potter and order of the phoenix,exams,capping practice, completion of capping things, drinking sessions (at my place, twice!),tummy aches and constipation(i just had to put this!haha!) and now we're currently working on forming a band again. what can you say, mga ambisyosa lng naman ang nglalakas-loob pumasok sa nescafe soundskool.haha.super goodluck. one word: stress. haha, but fortunately, my skin finally agreed to cooperate with me for once. funny how my breakout diminished just when i ran out of facial treatments. weird. kahit nakakapag basa padin ako ng aking all-time favorit hobby, which is reading fanfics, i still feel tired. sobra. so far, so good. im doing fine. nakakatuwa yung feeling na makakasalubong m mga dati mong friends and classmates. i still miss them and the old times. oh, well. today is july 20, meg's birthday! happy birthday girlfriend!

yes, i really am, missing out on so much in my social life. it started this last summer. besides not having enuf money, motivation seems to have deserted me completely. and my friends are now noticing that i am really hard to get invited into anything. last night was the proof. it was meg's early 19th bday celebration and at the same time louise's 18th bday. meg's party wwas held at the foodshop, the famous drinking place in our school. ning's having a buffet feast in her aunt's house. so saan naman ako pupunta diba? the fact na nauna ang invitation ni louise, i already said yes to both(yes, i know, that was bad of me to do so)and in the end of the day, i stayed at home.hah. yeah, i did, and i have a good reason to do so. i went to gym the day before and the desire to lose some weight slapped me in the face the following morning. i could not move my muscles. haha.add the nice weather(i was so thrilled when it started to rain, hard) plus my ever lack of motovation, and there you go, wala kong pinuntahan. and the truth is, this attitude of mine is starting to scare me. was it because i really lack motivation to move my ass, or because i dnt want to company? its not the latter for sure, but i find my laziness harder and harder to cure. gah! and meg and i almost got into a light argument about it. hindi ko na lang pinalaki, kasi kapag mas lalo nila akong pinapaguilty na kesho ang hirap ko daw ayain, lalo akong nawawalan ng gana pumunta.its not that mahirap akong ayain, kaya lng the circumstances are just not the lucky. laging may hindrances. and i guess yun ang hindi nila maintindihan. oh, well.i just have to let this out. im off downloading death note soundtrack. love light!haha

wow. time flies so fast. now im in my 3rd year of nursing, im super busy (as supposed to be), and i find myself bothering to reconstruct this poor but cherished blog of mine. as you can see, it's freakin' purple!haha! just want to change the mood from the angsty, depressed background to a more calm, relaxing one. just like what i feel right now. one word to describe myself right now: okay. im okay. doing fine, though nothing spectacular is happening in my life, i have yet to wait. and wait. thats all i have to do. well, ive spent too much time trying to familiarize myself again with sitd. and it's nice to see that this still works. hurray! okay, this is nonsense, i should be updating this blog with happening in my life, new people (as always), old flames (hah! as if), and old habits getting worse (i KNOW!) so what else is there?hmn.

dear sitD. just to let you know, im stil alive.cheers.Ü March 10, 2007- my diary turned 3.im so happy!Ü

im freakin' 19!! one more year and then bye bye teenage years...aaww...but honestly i stll feel in stuck in my 16th year.haha, i dnt know, shucks....again, im managing to get by in my classes...

korean drama. taiwanese drama. princess hours. it started with a kiss. my latest obsession during christmas break! christmas was good, so was my new year. still, i can't wait to be in my 3rd year, can't wait to get out of my class.

okay, i was a bit..exaggerating in my previous entry..i was.depressed, okay but i'm doing fine. honing my social skills to the hilt. what the hell..... christmas break.yay. parents gone, they're in Davao for a one week vacation, and we're here, bummung our arses off, watchin dvd, sufing net, eating and just goofing around. can't wait for my rents to go back, im expecting tons of pasalubong!hehe. okay...uhm...yeah. gawd.

i hate this semester. i hate my classes, my schedule, and most of all, i hate my classmates.

really, i do...tagal ko na din hindi nakakadrop-by dito...lagi kasi akong nagmamadali tuwing naguupdate ako dahil lagi ako sa computer shop nag iinternet...and xempre i couldnt very well express my emotion kapag wala ako sa bahay.hay..i miss those times na nkkpgupdate ako dito anytime i want, everytime na may nangyayari sa buhay ko na i want to put here. hindi ko na ma isa-isa yung mga recent happenings sa buhay ko, dahil wala nang thrill eh.. mas maganda talaga yung right after na mag nangyari, i'll be sitting here typing away the memories...well..ang tanging magagawa ko lng is to reminisce it.. the past months has not been that good to me. i feel like im slowly losing a friend. we share the same circle of friends, kaya lang she didnt know kung bkit akolumalayo, and it hurts to see that she sees it in the wrong way. of course there's the mistake in my part dahil hindi ko sa kinakausap about that...hay, so complicated. we're okay na parang hindi, its like theres a wall between us na...di ko alam kung anong mangyayari this next sem..sana ok lng.. and again, i tried my luck in a band. dapat kasali kme sa muziklaban, pero nagkandalokoloko na...well..so much for that. pc's temporarily ok, hindi ko alam kung kelan uli to magloloko. i have to enjoy this while it last. kinakabahan p ako xa hindi ko pa nasasabi sa parents ko na my back subject ako. shit...

holy crickets...when was the last time i posted an entry..i mean a DECENT entry...hmn....burado na mga letter sa keyboards ng pc dito sa fave computer shop ko... hmn...reco..new friends...new people..new stuff...new depression..that's what's new this year...jap boy went back to his homeland..so that was a wasted potential love affair...haha...shet hindi parin to disente eh....just for the sake of updating..i love this blog of mine...this is one of the few things im getting quite sentimental...im like that to things...but to persons...wag na, mas sentimental sakin yung mga bagay na binigay ng mga taong special saken, mas maganda yun kapag nawala sila...what the fcuking hell...off downloading songs...