So today was a blahhh day. Clay or matt didn't day anything to me about the whole incident on friday. I mean it was pretty random to see four girls u know from school yelling red rum at you with the finger moving thingy. Im kind of relieved that clay didn't say anything to me. I mean i only have liked the guy since 8th grade, i wouldn't want him to think of me as some FREAK now. (although we all know i am). I am pretty pathetic though. Liking a guy for sooo long. I mean people ask me if i still like him and i say yes because i think i still do? But now with apple? Its soo confussing. Andrea says you can't like two guys at the same time. Is that true? I feel like ripping off my braces with my bare hands. I mean those who know me know how paranoid i get when something is on me or different about me than every one else...ASS! This guy in my spanish class keeps telling me to smile, and he trys to get me to but i just can't. I mean who wants to see the metal shit in my teeth? I don't know why im so picky about them now then I ever was before? Maybe I talk more than I did or something and now people actually see me talking. So Kings class so a bore like always. She didn't call on me for anything today and she usually doesn't. I try to never make eye contact with her and always pretend to be working on her shit when really im just doodling on my paper. I swear if that pig calls on me to read hamlet or something I will shoot myself. I hate reading out loud, its my worst fear! I need to let go let go let go let go of this pride I'll be alone dancing you know it baby I am helpless for you