yo! I spent more time last night thinking than sleeping... A lots been on my mind... well... this is a diary... and I am anonymous... so I'll just say it without much worry then... Last night, I kept going over my relationship with my ex... analyzing it down to every last detail... Parts of it I think I may never figure out... To tell you about it... would take way to long... To sum it up a bit without writing a best seller... I ended up falling for my complete opposite... True... we did have quite a lot in common... but in both personality and astrologically wise... we couldn't have been more dissimilar... I'm not entirely sure why I fell so hard for her... There were probably many reasons why... This seems to be what haunts me... Perhaps it was just because I was so desperate to find someone that I so easily attached myself to a pretty girl that seemed to like me... I knew from the beginning that the odds were against us being together... That may have been a good reason in itself... It was almost romantic in a sense that even though we were so different and the signs seemed to say we couldn't... we seemed to have a thing for each other anyway... Maybe it was also the fact that I couldn't have her, she lives to far away... I hated it... not being able to hold her when she needed me... She could have had anyone she wanted... The idea that she wanted me... was quite overwhelming... and I think I became blind to our faults... I wanted it to last forever... it didn't... It's been a while... since I've last talked to her... I always feel a little guilty... because I fear something may have happened to her... and I wasn't there to support her... It's not as if I stopped loving her... I'm not really sure how I feel about her now....................I miss her... "Limitless, undying love, which shines around me like a million suns" - John Lennon, a man with a truly beautiful mind... Peace and love to all... -Adolfo- p.s. long entry huh? Thanks for the comments