g-damn. im wide awake on a monday morning. i should be passed out in an alley or gutter somewhere. i should be basting in my own body-fluids while strangers walk past glaring at me with disgust. i should be in the bed of some pretty nameless doll i picked up the night before halfway between the next bar and a 7-11. i should be bruised and redeemed sitting in jail while my brother pays the bail. i should be waking up tied to something and wearing ass-less-chaps. i should be dead. or so i assume thats how my sunday evening should have went. it didnt though - well apparently it didnt or i wouldnt be sitting here typing up this garbage. last night was boring - not that i completely believe in boredom...i mean what did the cavemen do day in and day out...not much im sure and im also sure that they didnt bitch and whine about how BORING their fucking day was. back then...back in the stone age boredom like airplanes didnt exist. things went and came and went and came just as they did and no one had enough intelligence to complain about it. but im not a caveman am i? well in many aspects im not...i still love to club my women and drag them around by their pretty long hair...or not. -------------------------- so here i am. wide awake and my balls itch. and not in that sweaty itchy way...but in that way that only rough sex and some whipping can solve. did i ever tell you that story about me, a shitzou, and duct tape? no? good, you wouldnt understand it i assure you. it was all a set up...or so ill say. -------- ive decided that dating and i are just never going to make any sense so i might as well stick to anonymous sex. pair me with a guy or a girl and things can get outrageous in about 3 to 4 weeks. my track record reads more like a hitlist. damn you fudgy pants. ---------------------------------------- my stomach hurts. too much drinking on an empty tummy. damn you caffeinated beer...damn you to glorious hell. ---- and yet i ramble. i wonder what ill do today. lets see, i could: *break something *have pity sex with a fat chick *learn how to play the accordion *start a really cool boy band that ill call the dildos *look for a job *quit my job *wander the streets aimlessly and panhandle *go on a shoplfting spree i do need papertowels *sit in the park and drink *go visit the ER *get laid by someone hot and not fat *buy a fish *pretend im crazy and hangout in the grocery store *play marco polo with someone blind well well well...the activities i can participate in today are endless and overall exciting. maybe i should start with the getting laid one...it has been about 12 hours since my last romp with anyone willing. god im such a love machine... dont forget to have fun today kiddies and dont play nice...because nice is boring... the fucking ho-smackin-pimp -alexander