it was her not me. or maybe it still is her and not me. she won/t take a chance on me. she doesn/t trust my type of personality. or popularity. i go out too much. i drink too much. i love drugs too much. and she avoids the previously mentioned. she/s basically a saint. and i am nothing but corrupt. it isn/t religious. she just doesn/t trust my type of rest or activities. i can/t blame her. but at the same time i do. -------------------------- FUCK relationships. i/m obviously not good at them at this moment. i/m better at drinks and lounging. rubbing elbows with people who believe they/re actually important. and so is high-society. ------------------------------ i need to move away from my parentalunits. they/ve taken right back to catering to me. see-ing to my every need. and it/s more then annoying. aw. but i should not complain. for they are paying for my recovery. or better yet my re-introduction to the real world. long story short. never visit family when you/re experiencing a mental break down. they cry. they take the blame. you allow them of course. and they try to make a "mends" of the entire situation. ------------------ right now i/m rambling. so please remember that while reading anything i write. it may or may not be truth. but closer to sci-fi. ARGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH. bacardi 151 does not mix well with meds. first rule of my thumbs. sincerely without conviction -alexander the destroyer of worlds