Expecially Girl Giants. There is way too much stuff going through my head at the moment. So we'll start at the beginning. I have recently lost a friend, by means of her accusing me of something I didn't do. Apparently, I "stole".. yes those were the words. I "stole" some form of her clothing. 1) I couldn't wear her clothes as they are two sizes too big for me. 2) I just couldn't do it anyway, as thats a prety shity thing to do to a friend. Even if they have been an unbelieveably shit friend. Which over the past 8 months she has. But still. I'm quite glad this has all come to a head, It means I don't have to put up with shitty friendships. Remember when said I wasn't going to let my feelings get in the way, and that I wan't actually going to have any. Yeah well 4-5 months in and I kinda do. I kinda maybe love him. And he's gonna break my heart. I know it. But I can't let go. I like it when he tells me he loves me, my heart smiles. Bless. But, thinking about what we have, kinda literally. It's not even clear we're in a relationship. But I do enjoy the way he calls my name when i'm fucking his brains out. If it's just sex then thats fine. I can seperate my emotion from my needs. I hope. I guess its because he said he loves me. But it's not as if he's said it to get into my pants. As to speak. That happend months ago, with the whole one night stand lark. So he knows what i'm like, and he knows full well that he doesn't need to pretend anything. So that makes me think is he telling the truth. My mind ponders. But it's got to that point in which I would be utterly gutted if I was to find out he slept with someone else. Which bugs me. Because he's the male version of me, and I know that if I happend to meet someone, given the chance I would possibly not say no. That and I know him quite well, and I cannot trust him. Which basically throws away any chance of anything. Well. Ain't I the luckiest peson ever. Heh.