89- Duality

Listening to: Duality- Slipknot
Feeling: paranoid
(I push my fingers into my) Eyes It’s the only thing that slowly stops the ache But it’s made of all the things I have to take Jesus it never ends, it works its way inside If the pain goes on… I have screamed until my veins collapsed I waited as my time’s elapsed Now all I do is live with so much fate I've wished for this, I've bitched at that I've left behind this little fact You cannot kill what you did not create I've gotta say what I've gotta say And then I swear I'll go away But I can't promise you'll enjoy the noise I guess I’ll save the best for last My future seems like one big past You’re left with me 'cause you left me no choice I push my fingers into my eyes It’s the only thing that slowly stops the ache If the pains goes on I'm not gonna make it! Put me back together Or separate the skin from bone Leave me all the pieces Then you can leave me alone Tell me the reality Is better than the dream But I found out the hard way Nothing is what it seems! I push my fingers into my eyes It’s the only thing that slowly stops the ache But it’s made of all The things I have to take Jesus it never ends It works its way inside If the pain goes on I'm not gonna make it! All I've got All I've gone is insane! All I've got All I've gone is insane! All I've got! All I've gone is insane! All I've got! All I've gone is insane! All I've got All I've gone is insane! All I've got All I've gone is insane! I push my fingers into my eyes It’s the only thing that slowly stops the ache But it’s made of all The things I have to take Jesus it never ends It works its way inside If the pain goes on I'm not gonna make it! All I've got All I've gone is insane! All I've got All I've gone is insane! All I've got! All I've gone is insane! All I've got! All I've gone is insane!
July 1st was a GREAT Day! I haven't had that much fun since last November. I got sooo fucked up. It was great! I stayed the night with Tara D. Melissa F was there too. When we got there we ate some chips that Melissa stole from her dad. Then later we drank San Juan. That shit is good. It's really really sweet. Then Cary, Colby and Caleb came over. They are all brothers and I'm dating Cary. Colby and Caleb were both hitting on me and I was just laughing my ass off cuz I was drunk. They all left. Cary said he was going to sneak out and come back to see me. Tara and Melissa both passed out and I was trying to wake them up cuz when I get drunk I don't sleep. I just want to party even more cuz it is great fun. I gave up on them and I called Cary to see if he was coming back. He snuck out and I picked him up halfway so his parents wouldn't hear my car. At like 1 a.m. he needed to leave so I drove him back halfway and then I went back to Tara's house. I laid down on the couch and I couldn't sleep. It was like 2 a.m. the last time I remember looking at my cell phone. I guess I fell asleep sometime around there. Then I woke up at 5 a.m. I donno why but I couldn't fall back asleep. I got up and ate a cookie and watched some tv. Then at like 9 a.m. Tara and Melissa got up. Yeah well I'm too lazy to write anymore stuff about that day so deal with it. Today hasn't really been a good day. I woke up with a sore throat and my throat has been swelling up since. I was sick just two weeks ago and I thought it would be the last time till after my surgery. Well it wasn't and its really pissing me off. I have surgery this friday to get my tonsils out. I don't get to play sports for 14 days cuz it can cause bleeding. Well I have my basketball tournment tomorrow and its the last basketball games. So I really want to go play basketball but my mom said I can't if I'm running a fever. So I really hope I'm not running a fever tomorrow. I also want to play in my softball game on Wednesday cuz it will be the last softball game that I get to play in before my surgery and I won't get to play again for 14 days after my surgery. Well nobody is gonna read this and I don't really care cuz I am only writing for my own good. Alyssa
Read 4 comments
I read it... very interesting stuff... I hate not talking anymore...

kyle
[Anonymous]
wow. you sure are gettin crazy stupid hoe!
Hey sounds like the 1st was a good day for you lol.. ttyl.. hope every thing goes good on friday laters
you were my inspiration to update!
lol.
ch-check it out.
[Anonymous]