i was walking and i saw the clouds break apart and the sun was behind them. when i got inside i sat in the desk that feels too small. it was already dim. the lights were then turned off and it got darker. we watched some art film. i did not much feel like watching some art film, so i just looked at the screen, instead. i turned my head to the left and i caught an eye and then i turned back to the screen. i was thinking of this idea that is suppose to be in everyone's self--the idea that not a single person doesn't like to be smiled at because chemically, or maybe biologically, it induces the release of a type of endorphin and i think that it makes sense. anyway, the door opened and a gash of light was made on the floor and that was all i saw. then i looked at everyone else and wondered how many of them were watching and how many of them were just looking. when i glanced to my left again i was pretty sure that she was just looking. it felt strange for a moment, to be trying to live in another's head. i don't know why but it did. i wasn't bored at all and i didn't want the class to end. i couldn't believe how easy it must be to make someone happy. then, being decidedly selfish, i figured i would do that more from now on. i could, i thought, i really could if i became that and i can become that. i'll start with her first, eventually, i will start with her. yes, i had made up my mind. eventually. the lights turned on but it was the dark that came back.