Good gravy, I complain about feeling lonely or something quazi-normal and you guys rush to comfort. Somebody dies and I get nothing. I haven't just written in a non-quizzical guarded sort of way in a long time. With that in mind... I sorta gotta say a lot in a little bit. Once upon a time, on a bus, I met a girl. She smiled at me, and I at her. Several occasions and a poem later, she left me a note that said "do you like being referred to as bus boy? let me know.(435)770-6444" I was thrilled. We went out, about once a month. She said she was busy, and I believed her. It made sense. She works a full-time job at my old elementary school which I visit often, and she has 17 credits in school. So we saw each other when it worked out, which wasn't very often. She invited me to do something over spring break... I went to California. It was the first time I turned her down for anything. Since then I have called three times and texted her once. She didn't answer my first two calls to which I left messages she didn't return. Then she called me in between classes to tell me she didn't have texts. So I called her that night to see what was going on and she told me she was busy and she would call me back. That was two days ago. I don't really expect to do anything with her anymore, but is it too much to ask that I at least get the chance to get some closure in knowing that she really doesn't want to talk to me. Or is it no longer considered courteous to stay on the phone long enough for someone else to ask if you want to see them anymore? Thats my dilemma of most importance. I really wouldn't mind going back to my trusting innocent world where I just waited obliviously, only somehow life doesn't work that way. I guess I was WAY too cute for her anyway. but damn it I wan't closure, closure I tell you(now I am just ranting).