i reinforced the fact that i do have good observation skills. and in doing so, i think i have scared yet another person awayy. i saw that this boyy had a green ruler, a green binder, and a green backpack. so when i saw him later in the hallwayy, i randomlyy tapped him on the shoulder and asked if his favorite color was green. he said yes, and it was because his birthdayy if saint patrick's dayy. and then he walked awayy from me reallyy quicklyy. leaving me to think about how much i was dreading march seventeenth. just like how i'm dreading february fourteenth. and exactlyy how i was dreading todayy, february eighth. i can usuallyy handle little problems and setbacks just fine. but todayy, too manyy of these little problems were hurdled at me. i had no time to duck. it's so frustrating!! and myy tear ducts were readyy to spring into action. it's stupid because i rarelyy cryy. and todayy, i was trying hard not to. i just realized that wheneverr i feel frustrated/angry/upset, i get this extra surge of energyy. to run. to punch at something. to scream. but instead, i laid down in bed and let visions of a perfect world seep into myy brain. oh, and i now know for sure that he hates me. well, he doesn't hate me, but he doesn't like me either. stupid me. blurting out feelings like that.