the kid who is obsessed with me just posted another blog entry. it sounds like one of his "i'm gonna try kill myself again" type entries. characteristics of the usual pre-suicide attempt entry: -general vagueness -talk alluding to the end of something -bitterness toward someone or an event the entry has all of these. but i don't want to talk to him. i just can't do it. i can't handle him spilling his guts to me every time we converse. it's not something i should have to deal with. it's getting to the point where i can no longer appreciate his feelings--he just seems so desperate, so needy, so lonely--that i could never give him what he really needs. he has me pinned as somebody i'm not. i want to end that tangent of his thought right now. he thinks that i can and will always be there for him. he thinks that i want to hear him say all of that sappy shit to me. he thinks that i want to hear him describe how nervous and giddy he gets every time he even e-mails me. he thinks that i am genuinely interested in being his girlfriend. he thinks that i reciprocate his feelings. it's not true. i wish i could stop leading him on. i just don't know how.