he hit me again last night... hard... in the face. the only thing i had to help myself were the push pins in my drawer. i spelled his name on my knee. it hurts like a bitch and the places where i ripped the skin are all green-ish. it hasnt hurt this much for a long time. it hasnt hurt at all for a long time. just... happy... i dont know. i wanted to kill him. but he was gone and he locked himself in his own room. he's gone now. i know this is the first i've said of it... but since my friends neice let me have this one because the other got deactivated thanks to my fucked up email account. so some of her entries are still here. but some sound like the could be me so i left them. i dont even know this girl, but i was at her aunts house and she started iming me and we started talking about this place and she just goes "take the one i dont use. lillithrysa" so i did. so for total update... well... i dotn know. why doesi t matter? nobody cares? jade you fucker tell me where you put them!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i can't get out of here today to meet nick to get the other thing. i need them back.