i love the distillers. everytime i listen to them i love them more and more. and brody is hot so... i had a run in with bianca today and it wasnt pretty. she was talking to jason in the hall. she was flirting shamelessly with him, and i could tell he didnt want any of it. he was giving me all these funny looks. it was almost a totally different side to her. i've seen her be a bitch, but it was a different kind today. the other day i was chatting with one of her best friends, anita, and i asked how bianca was, and she was like "bianca, the jilted bride?", which was a bit funny. sometimes i dont know what i saw in her. but its too hard to let go. theres too much pain there, i think. for me as well as her... anyway, jason, my brother from another mother...and father, is getting quite friendly with this girl at school called trish. which i think is a good thing. he hasnt had a girlfriend for ages, since he broke up with stacy which was almost a year ago, i think. he and stacy were so good together. and stacy was cool. she was smart and funny, and she got along with everyone, everyone being our group of friends, because she and jason were from different circles...you know? it was just a shame it had to end so badly. she got pregnant and her parents sent her away to her grandparents, in california. they broke up before she left and she didnt write or anything. so jason doesnt know if she had the baby or not...and its so sad. my best friend could have a son or daughter. my best friend could be a dad. and he doesnt know where stacy is, or how to contact her. he tried talking to her parents once, but they wouldn't have it. sigh. stuff like this happens all the time though, right? you dont know until it happens to you or someone you know. and jason was so depressed for a long time afterwards too. and i know how that is...being depressed that is... but that another story and i dont want to go through that again. it kills me to think about how stupid i was being... see you later, diary...