I didn't quite know how to take the party I went to this evening. Of course, people were drinking, laughing, chattering amongst the beautiful speech given by the heavy rain. They were having a good time, but I was too busy trying to decide whether or not I was having a good time or whether or not I just felt like an octagonal peg in a triangular hole. A peg that just did not fit. There was no way I fit in. Ashley's friends from Farmington were there, and amongst them, a few people I knew: friends from high school (one of them is Ashley), her parents (wicked cool people), and Shannon, who was scramming for food when I did, since I had the car. I suppose here it's necessary to give a little bit of history. Tammy, Ashley, and Jill are all friends from high school. While I still keep in touch with them all, they're all so far removed from high school that I can't relate to them anymore. Tammy's been away for so long that the person I knew then and the one I see now are so different. Jill's always been Jill, but I feel like we've just grown in different ways, and too far apart. Same with Ashley. And it's a pretty weird feeling when you don't feel comfortable even around those you call your friends. It's regrettable, but unavoidable. Sometimes we just follow very different roots on the tree, and when you try to go back to the source, you're more lost than a mouse in a maze without the cheese at the end.