what the hell? i come downstairs to get the shitty computer the one at shin level with a kiddie chair which is what i'm sitting in....the lady whom is blonde is watching american idol i hate that show.I'ts so stupid and materialistic...oh well take a deep breath...that's what i'm trying to do...i STILL haven't heard from JUSTIN and i leave in like 2 days no more computer oh well i'll get tezz to get him to read it or call me sumthin it's just so hard when your talking to the person who your going to attempt confessing your love to...i don't know if i'm strong enough or deep enough to convey such a difficult emotion....i just can't...roommate has a new thing she can talk now so that's all she's doing it's so annoying all she does is squeal...it's driving me insane and i have to deal with 2 days of no one seeing my cutting and such cuz i'm doing that again and i don't want to be in this hospital shit anymore i wanna go back to my school oh yeah plus there's that on top of it all i may have to go to O'neil or central yay ex's school the one i told i loved that would be so hard having to see him everyday and have him know that i'm trying to get over him is hard and i don't know anyone plus tezz didnt answer my fucking e-mail omg....the walls are caving in around me and i'm stuck in the middle of this.....i ....just........can't....take........it..........anymore.........p.s.i died my hair black