It came to me today quite clearly and i was totally surprised when it did. I reliezed that for quiet some time now i have been "normal" almost all the time as of late. I dont really know why. I havent been the good old crazy Ryan as i have always been. Its very disapointing not being weird and different. So i think its time that i did something about it, and reclaimed my throne as master of randomness. Yes i mean "master" because i have yet to find someone who can out random me! There are immitators out there *points* you know who you are, but you aint got this babies. hehe oh yes ahh the goggles they do nothing!!! Oh yes its already coming back to me now. Well you see it all started back in the 1920's. I was a small one legged boy named sherbert about the age of 6'7" and i was walking home from the poppernickel bread store, and the funniest thing happened that day...oh yes it was such a very joyous time... you see mrs. fluffers my next door neighbor, had a cat. well i wouldn't say cat it was more like a bread stick...but i never really like to argue with her about it because she always had that damn shotgun on hand... sigh. But anywho as i was saying i was walking home and well i was mrs. fluffers breadstick...err i mean "cat" in the tree, and low and behold mrs. fluffers was below with her pancakes uh floppin desperately trying to get her "cat" out of this tree. So i walked causlly up to the scene and asked if i could help at all. She smiled and said " oh sure you can, you see i cant get my dumplings out of the bakers rack unless i get a ladder." i asked if she had one at her house but, she said no. I then reliezed that the fireman down in town had a ladder i might be able to use. So i ran merrily down town to the fireman station. I knocked on the door, and as you would expectit, a rather furry, and disgrunted bowling ball of a man wearing nothing cornbread burst out of the door screaming " Deep blue , me can't find the house mitten, me is fire!' Naturally i was a little shaken by this. so i calmly ask the man if he had a ladder. He just turned with the biggest happiest smile a person could show and said " oh laddy you know there no such thing as blue berry pie up me ass." So i decided that this probably wasn't the best place to be at this particular moment, and decided it best if i ran away quickly as possible. But wait theres more... dont turn that dial! The large man gave chase and i sprinted fiercely through the traffic down the lane and jumped into a pile of cabbage. They cam in 2's and 3's with there bamboosles.. and fandooles.. no wait wrong story... but ahem * Hoping to god that this Blue cornbread wearing homo, wouldn't find me. Luckly, from a mailbox incident he got hepititus C and passed away 4 months later. God do you have any idea what its like living in a pile of cabbage for 4 months???! I then ran to the near by hardware store and took a quick breather. I decided that i should probably find a ladder for mrs. fluffers before she killed herself trying to get that damn breadstick. So the hardware store man said that if i brought him a feather that he would give me a ladder. This was certainly odd for me because..well i had the 56 cents to buy a ladder...but wtf would he need a feather for? So i ran down the lane to the only logical source for a feather... yes you guessed it a book store. (Where the hell is this coming from?) So i walked inside and found the librarian lady. She looked up and spoke very softly " ask the gnome, in the jungle and you shall find..." So i'm like " uh huh...yeah...ok is everyone on lsd here..." So i went to this "jungle" of hers... lol you perves.. anywho it basically was a pile of red yarn in the corner that appeared to be a shrine to a god of some kind. After many seconds of screechingi managed to move the yarn and low and behold there was a lawn gnome. It was the cheap k-mart one...you know the 14 inch tall fat old guy pushing the little wheelbarrel with his stupid little smile and cheeks that resembled nerf balls, and the gay ass pointed hat. " oh great fucking lawn gnome... where might i find a feather...?" The gnome replied " Bring me a car battery, dental floss, and a taco.... go now my son... the yeast is rising!" I slowly backed away.. and said " wow... uh... why do you need that? The gnome replied " Fiddle me curtains, is that your sock on ur nose or are me tulips too pressed for the wedding snapple?" Out of fear i ran for dear life to find what ever this great godly gnome wanted for the information i sought. I went to the tennis store and bought some icream. " Dude man they were like every where... they came out of the trees man.... they came out of the fucking trees!" Well sry i think i have to conclude this story for now for my hair is thick with ducks and i can no longer break the cheese that gives me breath. Translation: ( i'm tired and its 2 am and i want to fawking sleep) well yeah it feel good to say something like the good old days. I think i'll finish this later lol i dont know why but hehe.