I had a dream... a very wierd and somewhat... alerting? Ionno, seems like a premonition or a foretelling of what my future looks like, or maybe just what I experienced throughout the day put out in a wierd way XD... I was sitting in some restaurant with a whole bunch of people, and there was this one girl, who was a waitress, who i was interested in. There was a voice near me, telling me to talk to her and get to know her. But with my passive personality, I kept on saying know and stalling time. Finally, I had enough courage to talk to her, got up and just when I was about to introduce myself, someone else comes along suddenly, introduces himself and leads that girl away before i could do anything.... Second part of my dream, I was driving some SUV down some slope similar to that of Atwater St leading from the AMC (if you live where I live, you might know where I'm talking about =p). There's a traffic jam that comes to a comlpete stop and i stop. Becoming curious, I get out of my car and see what's happening in front. Some reason, there's a guy taking some cute girl (yes, again =p) hostage with a knife. And being some hero that everyone imagines one to be, I rush and disable the hostage-taker quick enough with the knife i was carrying. I get recognized for what I've done and i get to meet this cute girl. Just as things were going out great.... my alarm goes off. I wanted to doze a little longer to see what would happen, but it happens to be a sunday morning and i had a *(@$&(*@ load of chinese work to do before i went to school >.> So then and there the dream ends.... never knowing what happens. This dream somehow seems perturbing somehow, so I thought about it for a while. With much influence of the knowledge of my introvertedness and my recent readings of foreshadowing and visions, it might be some sort of foretelling of how my future seems like.... never getting anything done and whenever I want to try, some else gets in the way and stops me.... *sigh* oh well, dreams are dreams and I prolly shouldnt' even think too much about it =P. On to more random topics in the venting of my thoughts..... It's the one-year anniversary for me with something very special... one year ago at about the same time as now, i started watching anime! great times.... starting with naruto, full moon wo sagashite, kare kano.... *sigh* anime changed me so much: the way i think about others and myself, the way i react to things, the way i act by myself..... making me think of things I never thought about before, bringing out some dormant side of me, making me question things I took to be the fact.... Wandering thoughts can make you think of things that would have never come to you if you were leading a busy life. While sitting idly (which happens to me a lot >.>), I thought of one thing: there is only ONE person that I know in this whole world who knows what and, somewhat, how I think.... Charlie, i want you to know that you're that special person ^.~ (which i don't know is a good thing or a bad thing =P) He's become my semi-confident.... telling him things I've never told anyone else, he's actually the first person I ever told some (but not all... not yet) of my secrets too. My parents don't even have a hint of the things i've told him.... I just want you to know Charlie, that you're a great friend to have. Now for something I've been complaining for a while... my mom... she barely has (if any) any trust or faith in me, and definitely too overprotective. For example, my mom doesn't want me walking home for some supermarket abuot 10min slow walk from my house. For (&*#%(#)* *#%&(#'s *(#%&(#* sake, I live in one of the richest parts of my city! There's no one here except for old and retired people, and yesterday, I didn't even see anyone close to my age! But enough persistence and she'll let me, but it's still annoying as hell. Other things, going out with friends; sure slightly more dangerous but hey, you can't live in fear all your life, can you? She wants to protect me (not so much my brother anymore since he's 21) by limiting my exposure to the outside world and keeping me home. ugh, more i stay home, the larger impact it is when i really realize how naive and simpleminded i am, which is already starting to happen >.> More recent example, she wants me to help install some sort of shelf in a wall so it'll make her cooking easier. So I thought of drilling a hole then using zip ties to hold it up, instead of screws. I reach for the power drill (which is some cheesy 14.4V cordless, nothing compared to the 32V wired drills i use for robotics), and she starts screaming to tell me to let go, because she doesn't want me using it, in fear that I don't know how to use it and how i might hurt myself in ways i don't know how. She wants me to only use it with the approval and in the presence of my dad, whom once agreed for me to take the cordless sander to school. Ugh... I really need to have a nice talk with her one day. She is just SO paranoid about everything... and her paranoia is seeping into me, i know it and i can't prevent it. On a VERY random note, I almost killed my brother a few days ago... He called for me to get him his Palm from his bedroom. Me on top floor, him on bottom. How our house is made, there's a little walkway overlooking the stair way coming up, and we have some pretty hefty boxes on that railing. While reaching over the edge to drop him his palm, I accidentally brushed the box next to me, causing it to fall... it contained some pretty heavy metal stuff. Just as it was falling, I saw "oh shit" look on my brother's face, and he dodged the falling box just in time. I made like 4 scratches in the wall and dented it in multiple places... joy >.> good thing i didn't hurt my brother =( My entries are getting WAYYYY too long -.-;;