ehhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.... words can have such powers ;_; so yea, random summary of my life at school so far... pretty slack (cuz i haven't started doing any homework or studying yet >.>) and well... okay... i guess =p. Yes, anyways, I've have pretty much a break with YLZ almost every single day now... (except on fridays >.> and i forgot if we do on mondays....) and we've been talking and doing random stuff a lot.... i guess i should be happy, but i've been discovering some stuff bout the two of us and well.... not exactly great XP oh well >.> yes.... okay, two more pieces of "poetry"... both out of desperation.... *sigh* i haven't thought of a title yet... maybe i'll find one one day, and maybe i'll edit them a bit.... everything's a maybe or perhaps or an if.... >.> so yea, enjoy the crap poetry: --------------------------------------- NO TITLE 19/01/06 I have thoughts that bind me here, Ones that make me wonder if this Place is really where I should be. I've hurdled myself into corners, Juggled my sanity in a dazed reality Tormented myself into sleep I'll look into my "closest" ones for support, Yet they will unknowingly turn away and deny me. I'm trying to escape from here, To run away, To flee from this tsunami of troubles, To build a shell around myself, To throw myself into a bliss And listen only to the ethereal voices Of the angels in my head. I want to change, To break from this shell and become a butterfly, To leave the nest and never come back, To be as free as the water in the ocean And the clouds in the sky. I'll build a castle in the heavens, I'll dance on the clouds, I'll embrace the sun, I'll court the moon and I'll kiss the rain. I'll open the dam to the river That flows within me to anyone Who wishes to engulf themselves, Yet I will not waste my precious breath, On those deaf mouths that surround me. --------------------------------------- NO TITLE 19/01/06 Wavering emotions that will not settle Memories that will not halt their barging, My feelings are like the tide of the sea, They shall come and go as they please, Never to stop in one place forever. I'll think that I love you, Yet my mind will doubt itself, And I'll think that my mind plays A cruel trickery on my heart. I cannot forgive myself. I do not know what you think, I'm bordering on opening myself Yet I cannot bring out such courage. We'll talk, We'll laugh, And we'll spend time together As mere friends staying in each other's company. But I treasure these moments, For they are the rainbows in my heart And the sparkles in my mind. I'll enjoy every second we're together, For they are the joy of my days And the core of my dreams. We'll discuss, and We'll argue. You'll tell me what you're thinking, But I cannot bear myself to pronounce The turmoil within my inner shell. Perhaps I'll spend the rest of my days Silent and blocking my emotions, Perhaps you'll walk away without ever knowing my feelings, Perhaps I'll be the Rosencrantz and Guildenstern of your life, And the Hamlet of mine own. I wish to stay true to myself and to you, Yet I know not of my true nature, And thus uncertain of my emotions, And the last thing I wish for is to hurt you. This uncertainty and ambiguity Is what tormets me so, I know not what to do But to let time take my hand And guide me along its path, For I am doomed by my character And bound by this love. --------------------------------------- anyways, i started watching a Korean Soap called Winter's Sonata, apparently supposedly really depressing at the end, but i'm only on ep2 right now... plus i don't think i even have enough HD space to store all the episodes >.> its gonna take 13gb.... >.> And yea, Yiruma's Beloved (vocal ver) is a really good song... its so calm and soothing.... >.>