Yesterday mom told me she has a lump on her chest, I saw it. She will be going to the doctors soon, not soon enough.

last May I found out the man I had called my fiancé was sleeping with numerous women behind my back. He had lied to me, deceived me, used me and took advantage of my time. I spent time and money on him and it was all a waste. I loved him, with all of my heart. He was the first and last thought of my day. He is now dead to me. I would love nothing more than to see someone stab him! I'd even like to hit him with my car. For months I felt nothing but hatred, pain, agony, and stress from the garbage he left behind. When we met, I wasn't even interested in him, I didn't even care for him... But he made me fall in love with him. He met an independent, strong willed woman, and turned her into a fucking mess. He is only a piece of history now. We haven't spoken since May of 2013. And it will always stay that way.

I love Ian, but I don't think He'll only want that.