Whats knackered?... I alphabetized my CDs today! :) ... I know I know that doesnt sound like much. And to anybody else it would seem boring. But not for me. Nooo. Actually, it put me in a good mood.. Up until 6:30pm rolled around.. I was sitting in the living room. Just finished watching Queen of the Damned, trying to find something else to watch. My dad walks into the room, mom following behind him. I figured they were just talking about something (mum's always got our backs). Out of nowhere, he just starts talking about my friends. About how they've drank (dranken? drinken?..) alcahol, smoked (cigars), and that he thinks Ishy and are gonna be following right in their footsteps. Atleast thats what I gathered.. One of us would ask a question about what he said, and he'd go back and say WHAT HE JUST SAID.. So thats why I still dont get why/what he was saying. My mom doesnt either.. Then he started raggin on my mom about why she doesnt want to go back to church because of what those people (old people at our old church) did. And that she doesnt know what its like to have lived it bad. And that she's not the only one who's gone through this.. As true as that may be, that doesnt mean that she cant deal with this her OWN way. And that "he had it worse. His dad left them, he was 14 and had to take care of his family. He had to quit school just to support his family! He could have gone to college and done something with his life! He could have gone next door to kill that man that raped his sister!" ..I never knew that.. But. EVERYBODY DEALS WITH LIFE DIFFERENTLY. Why cant anyone see that.. THEN he says that Ishy and I are still a little.. I forget the word he used, but, that Ishy and I are still angry at him for making us leave the church. And that we both have changed so much because of it.. Dude, I've changed for the better. Who I am now, isnt because we left that stupid church. I changed because *I* wanted to, not to get back at my dad for doing that. That's bullcrap. He just assumed. He didnt ASK if thats what it was. But I sure dont feel like explaining it to him, he wont understand... I dont expect him to understand.. I dont expect anyone to understand.. Oh and him saying that I've changed since we left that church.. Does that mean he doesnt like how I've changed?.. Well he can just deal with it. 'Cause its how I want to be. I never asked for his oppinion anyway :P I just wish that people would get to know me before they judge me. He says he knows me. But, see. He's the one that thinks I'm going to go start doing drugs and drinking and all that crap. He probly thinks I'm not a virgin too.. But I dont want to know what he thinks on that.. He thinks I'm gonna "lose my soul because of the path I'm going down". Dude. If I KNEW I was on my way doing that, I'd be getting as much help as I could.. But, I know even if I'm not right now.. I still need good friends that could help me. And I do have Tim and Gina to go to. And Shawn also said if I need help with anything I can go to him.. To get my point across... I'M NOT LOSING ANYTHING geeeeeez. I'm not gonna start doing drugs, and I'm not gonna start drinking... .....Well now. I'm going to youth group on Sunday. So if I'm not here before 9pm, you'll know why.. And if you've made it this far. God bless you. And thank you for reading. I hope you stop by again soon :) ~two words one choice no regrets~