I don't know why I'm so sad. I have so many things that I should be happy about, and yet Im utterly depressed. Sometimes I get scared that he doesnt care. Or that, perhaps, it just doesnt matter to him. I wish I was able to feel stable in matters such as this. I wish I didnt feel so helpless when it came to anything in my life. I hate admitting defeat. Im wearing thin. And Im lonelier than ever.. Sometimes...I feel hollow.