Listening to: Hurt by Johnny Cash
Feeling: sparkly
So i just found out that i am not who i want to be to some one i really care about, actually the only person i really care about. i never wanted to come off to this person as i geuss i did. i never knew what was going on with us and just found out. over the last few days i've looked over my "friends" and realize i'm no longer who i tried to be. i was so much more happy as a goth and now im just a fake. i just want the person who i've hurt to know that i am sorry to have treated her like i did. i have found who i am and wish to be alone now. its sad to say this again, but fuck u all. i'm tired and am pulling away from what has been the best thing in my pathetic life, the people who i have attached mysef to at the expense of myself. i feel this song:
Hurt
i hurt myself today
to see if i still feel
i focus on the pain
the only thing that's real
the needle tears a hole
the old familiar sting
try to kill it all away
but i remember everything
what have i become?
my sweetest friend
everyone i know
goes away in the end
you could have it all
my empire of dirt
i will let you down
i will make you hurt
i wear my crown of shit
on my liar's chair
full of broken thoughts
i cannot repair
beneath the stain of time
the feeling disappears
you are someone else
i am still right here
what have i become?
my sweetest friend
everyone i know
goes away in the end
you could have it all
my empire of dirt
i will let you down
i will make you hurt
if i could start again
a million miles away
i would keep myself
i would find a way
Goodbye-
Ben
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