Rock and Roll I finally feel a little better. Streching achy discomfort is pretty much not a problem anymore. I think it was just the baby getting setled maybe things will be easier on me now. My insurance is all messed up. I am changing plans from the crap ass,,,,"we don't cover pregnancy for twelve months" plan. Isn't that bulshit? Yeah. So I switched to Aetna. We are paying 500.00 dollars a months for it almost half of our income. ANd when I found out my insurance wasn't going to cover me my family was like "Oh don't worry, we'l help you".....And guess how they tried to help? By finding me numbers for welfare. Nice. Listen people my family has money, enough of it to share it. My grandparents will take $4000.00 Dollar cruises, but not help there grand daughter have a healthy child. I fecking hate medicaid. As far as I am concerned they killed my last child. So feck that. Rather be broke and have a healthy child. I just wanna be happy you know. I tried so long for this baby. So long. That my life started falling apart, because I was so deeply depressed. And now all I wanna do is be happy and everyone seems to be wanting to make me do the opposite. I'm tired of all the bullshit. Feck everyone. I am so glad I have my husband. I would feel lost without him, because the truth is I really have no one else. I just feel sad thinking about it that way. I love to give people my all, be there through thick and thin and they never seem to want to do it for me. So I resign from my place in society, this baby will be my life, my all, my sunshine,my air. And god forbid something were to happen to this baby of mine before hand I try again and pledge my life to it. I bid society and all it's nay sayers adue, you don't need me? I don't need you. ....................MELISSA....................