Prozac.. not the best thing for a 12 year old who already had fucked up thoughts in her head. Everyone tried really hard to make things better. Shauna and chelsey did everything they could to make me happy. I got through school and turned 13. Finally it was summer time. About two weeks after school ended, i was chattin away in a yahoo chat room when i see this messege come up that says "i'm bored someone talk to me" so i click on his name. and we have the most amazing conversation. and it just kept getting better and better. I didn't know at the time that i had found my soul mate. but it wasnt to long after that i did. Me and shay and chels stayed up all ngiht during the summer just chattin away. together me and nate would watch the sun come up. first on his side then on mine. we never got tired of talking to one another. Me and shay went on a trip for a week to the mountians up by lake tahoe. we went in her dads jeep and it was the most exhilerating thing i had ever done. it was boulders and cliffs and a lot of walking, no toilets.. no electricity nothing. just us a bunch of jeeps and rocks. And before i left nate told me that the only way i could go was if i took his number with me in case something happend. well nothing happened then. we just got really dirty and sunburnt. After we got back though.. i figured that maybe it was time to tell nate just how i felt about him. i was so afraid that he was going to laugh and never talk to me again but instead he said it back. =] well a couple weeks later my mom kinda flips her lid and took off for two days. we had no idea where in the world she was. Once Chris and leah found her i was pissed. i was so mad that me and shay went to a party on the friday after they found her ( i think it was a wensday). We got completely fucked up. Me and tequilla ended up naked on a table. well the next day.. litterally in the morning me and shay had to get up and meet her dad down by the jr. high so we could go back to the house and pack our stuff to go to cali with her boyfriend. talk about a major hangover. well i never told my mom that i was going with shay. i just left. and i also told nate that i would talk to him after i got there. my mom was none too happy when i just up and left. I didnt care. i was too pissed at her to be concerned. i know now that it was just me being petty but at the time it seemed like a good idea. Anyway we got to cali and i had never had so much freedom. Shays boyfriends house was huge his parents were loaded and we had free range to do whatever we wanted. and we did. we went swimming at 3 am made pancakes that would feed an army. we went to the movies all the time. we drank a lot. we did whatever we wanted. And all the while i missed talking to nate. I did as much as i could but sometimes he just didnt seem like he was that into me. sometimes it worried me. to be continued..