last night i broke down. i cried for 2 hours. i didnt sleep that well. i dont feel you look at me anymore... you used to tell me i was beautiful or pretty every single day... i havent heard you say it in a while. you dont act like you used to... sometimes you'd pounce on me and surprise me. you havent done that in almost a year. i know that things arent the way they used to be before i lost the baby...i lost the baby... the single most terrifying thing thats happened to me in my life.. i try to act like it doesnt hurt anymore but im sitting here crying. it hurts. it hurts a lot. sometimes i think that you deserve someone better... someone prettier...someone who can give you the family that you want.. i know that you love me and that you would do anything for me but honestly love i can see when your not happy. i can see it in your face when you want to give up... i dont want to loose you. i dont want to see you go and leave me.. but if there is any thought in your head that tells you you could be happier i want you to go...dont stay and be miserable with me. i love you i love you with my whole heart and soul. but please it hurts me more to know that your unhappy... all i want is for you to be happy. thats all. i love you....