There's just so much to be said So much is running through my head In a time staggered on the end Maybe now can we pretend? I'm going to a baby shower tomorrow, and a bunch of people are going to be there, some that I haven't seen or talked to in years. I'm nervous. I've been thinking so much about getting a job and my own place lately. I'd pretty up my place. I'd put in a small telly. Try and get a laptop. Get a lovely looking living room set, dining room set, bedroom set, all the good stuff. I'd put paintings up. Pictures. Rugs on the floor. Even paint the damn place. I've been dreaming about it. And now I'm only hoping that this dream comes true. That's all I can do at the moment. I'd even get someone to live with me. And I'd have a whole budget thing planned out. I wouldn't apply for a credit card, but a debit card, so I don't have to worry about debts. I'd be in college doing my own thing. Visit the family once in a while. I'll live a simple life. I just need my own car to get things started. College, job, home, car, fun. Two more years, I guess. I still haven't gotten my report card. I owe the school 37.50. I don't have that kind of money right now. And father isn't usually a generous person. I got my schedule though..or what is expected to be on my schedule for the year. I'm going to do everything to get good grades. Everything humanly possible that isn't too much. I need to start getting stuff for school so that when the time has actually come to get stuff for school, father doesn't have to spend too much at one time. Clothes, school supplies. I need a locker shelf too. I've never had one, but it looks like it's helpful. I'll update later. I need to clean.