Chapter 19 – Guilty Conscience “Hey Jake, I’m going home and getting some sleep, these waiting room chairs just don’t do it for me. If Nathan’s looking for me when he wakes up, tell him he can call my cell, ok?” “I’m good, thanks.” He said, staring blankly at the floor. “Jake?” “Mmm…” “Jake!” “Huh? What? I’m up, I swear!” I looked into his eyes, which were very bloodshot. “Jake, how much sleep have you gotten lately?” “Well, um… last night I-I kinda didn’t cuz there was this party and… tonight I kinda didn’t cuz there was this accident and…” I pulled him up, smiling slightly. “A hangover and no sleep? I don’t know how you do it Jake. Come on, you can stay at my place, you need some rest.” “But…but I’m not hungover… I only had a few drinks.” He took a few steps and stumbled; almost falling. I laughed. “If you say so Jake.” I pushed him in the direction of the exit. “Go out to the car, I’ll meet you there in a minute.” I walked over to Nathan. He looked so cute when he was asleep; I almost couldn’t wake him up. “Hey sweetie.” I said softly. “Hey.” He smiled tiredly at me. “Come on, we’re all going to my place to get some sleep.” “But… We can’t just leave Haley alone, what if she wakes up?” “Trust me Nath, the doctors have her out cold right now. They don’t want her to wake up; she’d be in too much pain. We’ll come back after we’ve all slept, I promise.” “Ok…” We walked past a hallway on our way to the exit, then looked back. Jake was wandering down it, looking into every window as he passed it. Nathan looked at Jake with an eyebrow raised. “He’s really sleep deprived.” I offered. I walked over to Jake. “Hey, Lily!” He said cheerfully. “Jake, what are you doing?” “Oh, I was just saying hi.” He turned back to the window of an empty room and waved merrily. “Ooookay... Well, come on Jake, we need to leave now.” I started pulling him down the hallway towards Nathan. “Ok, hang on, I gotta say goodbye.” He turned back to the window and waved again. “I’ll come back and visit!” We dragged him down the hallway and to the exit doors. “Oh yeah, um, those doors are locked.” Jake said knowingly. “See?” He walked over to one of the doors and pulled as hard as he could, but it didn’t move. “Uh, Jake?” Nathan pushed the door gently. It swung open easily. “Ohhh, so that’s how they open! Ok, close it, I’ll get it this time, I swear.” About 20 minutes later, we made it to the house. I got Jake settled in on the couch and went into my room. Nathan followed me. Hey, how come he gets to sleep with you?” Jake whined. I grinned and pulled Nathan over to me. “Because I love him.” I said, giving him a quick kiss. “Well, if I loved you, would I get to come too?” I laughed. “Jake, you don’t love me, so why even ask?” “I could love you.” He said defensively. “I mean, look at you, anyone could…” “Uh, Jake, aren’t you forgetting about something? Like maybe, me?” Nathan said. “Ooh, right, sorry Nate.” He turned back to me. “So as I was saying-” “Jake, stop hitting on my fiancé.” Nathan growled. “Jake, Nathan and I were kind of planning on being alone tonight.” I said, emphasizing the word alone. “OOOH, ok, I got it now! Well, can you at least try to keep the noise down then? Cuz I’m a light sleeper, and-” “Goodnight, Jake.” Nathan said, shutting the door. “Damn he’s annoying sometimes.” He looked at me, and a small smile crept across his face. “He was right, though.” “About what?” “You’re so beautiful, no one can help but love you.” “Aww… You’re so sweet… and such a liar.” He gave me a sad look. “Don’t talk like that… You’re beautiful. It’s no wonder every guy wants you.” I wrapped my arms around him. “Well, it’s not like there are any girls out there that wouldn’t love to date you.” I smiled at him. “Don’t worry so much Nathan. You are the only guy I will ever want.” I changed out of my clothes and collapsed onto the bed. It was about 2 in the afternoon. We’d stayed at the hospital for almost 24 hours, with very little sleep. Nathan changed into the boxers I’d given him and laid down next to me, wrapping his arms around me loosely. “I love you Lily.” “I love you too, Nathan.” Pretty soon, his breathing became even and deep. But even though I was extremely tired, I couldn’t sleep. I just kept picturing Haley when they’d pulled her out of the car, unconscious and bloody. And it was all my fault. I laid there for hours, just thinking. Finally, I couldn’t take it anymore. I slid carefully out of Nathan’s arms and changed quietly into my regular clothes. I kissed him good-bye and turned to leave. As I did, I spotted the fake I.D. he’d given me on our first date. I grabbed it and slipped it into my pocket.