[*142*] Drowning in my sleep

Somewhere b e t w e e n the procrastination, the homework, the friendships, and the nasty cafeteria food, the calls to old friends . . . the I miss yous . . .And the I LOVE yous . . . And the What are we doing tonights? . . . somewhere b e t w e e n all of the changing and growing And the skipping classes, the studying for tests, And the pretending to be studying for tests, And the downright not studying for tests, I forgot . . . I forgot what it meant to cry . . . I forgot that pretending to be happy doesnt make you happy . . . I f o r g o t that pretending to be smart doesnt make you smart . . . And that pretending to be ok doesnt make you ok . . . I forgot that you cant just forget the past in fear of the future . . . I forgot that you cant control falling in love . . . And that you cant make yourself fall in love . . . I learned . . . I learned that I can love . . . I learned that its ok to mess up . . . And its ok to ask for help . . . And its ok to feel like crap . . . I learned its ok to complain and whine to all your friends for a whole day . . . That somehow they'll make it all better . . . I learned that sometimes the things you want most you just cant have . . . I learned that the greatest thing about high school isn't going to be who is the most popular or going to be the parties . . . Or the drinking not even the hook-ups . . . Its the friendships, which means taking chances . . . I learned that sometimes the things we forgive and forget are the things which we most need to TALK out . . . I learned that letters from friends are the most important thing . . . And that sending cards to your friends makes you feel better . . . But, basically, I just learned that my friends, Both old and new, Are the most important people to me in the world . .
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