Ok, so I’ve gotta bitch. Why the hell are girls so damn disgusted and embarrassed about bowel movements? I mean what the fuck? Most(not all) girls I know would rather die then let a guy know that they are taking a shit. Like it’s a big fucking secret that you shit. You let us see you eat, right? Well, we KNOW theres an event that always follows that. You’re not fooling anyone. Drop the conspiracy, your cover is blown. And another thing, why the hell can’t you just fart? That’s another thing we know you do. So just let it out. Hell, I’d be impressed if a girl would just gather some courage and fart. I’d even make a crown for her if she could rip one that was louder than mine. “Queen Fartress, Matriarch of Bowel Movements.” Now, I do know when girls fart it smells worse than any other smell ever conceived. But just do like every guy does, either claim it and be proud…or just blame it on whoever is sitting next to you and make it into a game like so: “Who done it?” “I think it was Tiffany, in the car, with the Taco Bell beef.” So ladies, the next time you feel the need to shit, proclaim it loudly, so that all the world can hear. And if you need to fart, just do it and laugh. You KNOW its funny. Stop lying to us and yourself. In fact, I’m fucking tired of manners in general. If you wanna eat with your hands, just fucking do it. If you feel the need to wipe your mouth on your shirt, just do it and get the fuck over yourself. The way I see it, manners are just formalities of communication. They restrict us from oh my god… actually getting to know each other for who we really are. To me, they just don’t show respect at all. They just make people act like they don’t really want to act. They are a hassle not worth taking the time to go through. Now, I’m not saying go out there and act like a total animal…flinging about table scraps and growling at each other. All I’m saying is that people shouldn’t get so goddamn caught up in the mannerisms that they forget to be themselves. Enough said. Oh, and for some reason, I decided to listen to the gayest song I’ve ever heard. I like to listen to this song every now and again just to remind myself of what music ISN’T supposed to sound like. Wondering what song it is? Well, I’m not going to tell you. You’re just gonna have to guess. I’ll give you a hint: the band name is a word that is onomatopoeia, the song was used in Corky Romano, and the word “Jitterbug” is used in it. Got it? Ok, I can’t handle the suspense any longer. Its “Wake Me Up Before You Go-Go by Wham! ” Highlight for the answer. There could be a song about purple fairies doing jazzersize with the purple teletubby while Siegfried and Roy fuck eachother in the butt and it still wouldn’t be quite as gay as that song. Not that I’m a homophobe or anything, but even the Queer Eye people would say… “Wow. What a gay song?!” But seriously folks….anyone up for some anal sex? Hahahahaha. This entry got retarded REAL quickly. Ahh, well, I’m gonna go eat some glue. Mmmm….glue.