[I feel so stupid] All the people that I trust, and care about have warned me about earl, and i have heard the rumors about ..us.. and yet I still dont believe. I feel so stupid because they are all probobly true, everything that I have been told, and soemtimes even how i feel. On somedays- yeah it feels true. That he is probobaly playin me, but then when I try to talk to him about it, to force it out, he has no MF clue what I am talking about. But thats what he would want me to think if he was playin me. Everyone probably thinks I am so stupid for still being with him even after what i have been told, and what I have heard.. and when I hear it - it does sound believeable, but then when i am with him, it seems unbelieveable. Plus all the rumors that i heard came straight from Nathanals mouth.. and hes a liar... so how can i believe him? I wanna be able to trust earl, and I trust my friends..I just dont know what to believe. Because some of the things that poeple said that they heard I know arent true. Like one day they said they saw him with another girl in the halls between 7/8-9 hour.. I was that girl. He walks me to classes.. so how are they gonna say he was with someone else when i was right there? So just my friends sayin that to me makes it harder for me to believe them. But my one friend Nicole is the only one who thinks I should stay with him. She says you both look so cute together lol and she says you guys have so much fun together too! which is true, I have a lot of fun with him. Plus, she says she aint ever seen him with anyone else besides me. oo and today people were sayin that he goes with a black girl!.. I am not black, and my skin color is dark, but not dark enough to be mistaken for bein black.. so gotta ask him about that. My one friend who doesnt like earl at all thinks that i shouldnt ask him about the things i hear about who he goes with because "hes a dog and a liar" accordin to her. But he hasnt ever lied to me yet.. or at least I havent caught him in a lie yet. It hard distinguishing between all the lies and the truth when both are so convincing "I beg to dream and differ from the hollow lies"