"Why are you so negative?" That is what my brother asked me the other day. I've been asked the question by my sister, and two friends. I can't help it. I think that the cup is half empty. My favorite words include: fuck, shit, bitch, and loser. I love cuss words. I LOVE cuss words. I love names like, shit head, and dick head. I'm so disgusting. But you know I'm a girl. I am so polite, and so sweet. But the whole time I am polite and sweet I am thinking to myself, *Would I have sex with him?* and *I hate her. I hate him. I loathe that bitch over there." I have to be positive sometimes. I can't escape it. I know people want me to be positive. Afterwards and during these positive conversation and ideas I don't feel right. I don't want to be corny, ditzy, or stupid. Pessimistic people tend to be smarter, and I guess I see them has living in reality. Of course I am thinking negative things about optimistic personalities. I'm so negative. I'm not sure when it happened or what made it happened. I think it's a complex story starting at my childhood. But who gives a shit.